This train incident from Central to Causeway bay yesterday utterly amused me.
There wasnt any seats available being close to peak hour and so I had to stand in the middle of the cabin. What caught my eyes immediately was this early 30s China woman, sitting down in the seat to the left of where I stood, where her seat was facing me. Actually, it was her boobs display that caught my eyes rather than her rapid firing at someone over the phone.
She wasnt dressed indecently but was certainly provoking enough to draw attention to her rack. Wearing a typical oversized black shades and decked in a plunging V-shape neckline vest, complete with a black jacket.One wouldnt cast a second look at her because she wasnt anything to look at , if not for breasts.
In contrast to the dark outfit she had, her soft , creamy-white boobs were threatening to spill out of her tight chest hugging vest any moment. Those huge mamas were real alright because they had a sort of download pull (not saggy), and were uneven in size. Her vest was spanned open so wide that it basically barely covering her nipples at both ends. Everytime she turned her head and upper torso to check the station, it was hard not to oggle at the 2 milk buns swaying with her movement. As I was standing in front of her, it was hard not to look straight down between the valley of blossoms.
As I took in the sight before me, I suddenly had the notion to look around me, checking if anyone else was momentarily memorised by those pair of inviting knockers.
There next to be, was this HK delivery man, aged about late 30s or early 40s. I almost died from laughing observing his expressions. He was utterly memerised by those man-tou like boobs.
What made me laughed was the fact he looked almost breathless, and he was gulping down his saliva so often. Combined with a stoned face, slacken jaws, almost uncontrollable drool, with his glassy eyes all focused on one spot, his expression was pricelessly hilarious. He looked short of reaching his hands out to poke at those boobs. I have to admit, the boobs were rather inviting. The guy looked like he was in absolute paradise.
Another older man next to him, age about 50+ was much cooler. He had that air of "I have seen it all before" look. Sure he was also staring at the boobs but with a certain detachness about it. As for the professionals, guys decked in suit, they were more cowardly to stare openly. Instead, they threw furtive glances in the general boob direction while pretending to also be looking at something else. They shared a similar hunger as the delivery guy but more subtle and restrained. The women standing around were relunctant nor any desire to want to look at the offending boobs before them.
The China woman in the center of all these attention, seemed completely oblivious to the sort of stares she was getting at and down her boobs. In fact, she leaned even more front at occassional times and doesnt give a hoot.
Normally I would be indignant if male strangers throw any lecherous stare at innocent woman who accidentally reveal some intimate parts. However, this China woman basically was flaunting her chest and asking for all the attention, so in turn, I feel no sympathy nor any tinge of outrage for such deliberate blatant display. In fact, I was rather amused at all the various reactions on the men's faces. I wished I had some secret camera to take it down. If only...
Finally, the woman was preparing to alight and she stood up, walked over to the door. ALL the men then turned to stare at her, mentally checking her out from top to bottom, resting their eyes on their butt and then up again. The delivery man quickly moved to stand behind the woman, like a hunger puppy following his mistress. I finally couldnt contain myself and gave a loud chuckle. The older woman next to me smiled at my reaction. I think she had an inkling at what I was laughing about.
Well, I suppose no matter what era we are in, generally, men will be men. Throw a woman with half exposed tits and their imagination will be fired up and run amok.
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Latest album by 陈晓东.
One would not be unfamiliar with this HK singer Daniel 陈晓东.
This is one of my fav track （七十年后）from this latest album - 专辑名：星空梦游.
Not only does the melody captivates me, the verses of the lyrics are something one can identify with. Track download
歌曲名：七十年后
妈妈 第—句开口说的话
怕怕 拨电话没有人接答
抱抱 或许很久才回来吧
原来这是需要一个人才有的牵挂
亲亲 忘记不重要的东西
笑笑 抱着最软弱的记忆 是你
拜拜 挥去要掉下 的泪滴
原来这是对爱 最痛最美丽的方式
Someday sometime when I have seen your face
难道 要闭眼前才再见
—场大雨—场泪
痛倒 痛澈了心扉
如果一刻能撑到永久
会是谁来陪我到最后
天上人间 记忆重重 不要
放在七十年后
白发苍苍才来 回眸
Someday sometime when I have seen your face
谁能 把时间当作拥有
—场大雨—场泪
痛倒 痛到心憔悴
如果—刻能撑到永久
会是你来陪我到最后
天上人间 来往匆匆 不要
放在七十年后
走到尽头来牵着手
如果那刻能撑到永久
会是你来陪我到最后
天上人间 来往匆匆 不要
放在七十年后
白发苍苍才来 回眸
在梦里彼岸的守候
This is one of my fav track （七十年后）from this latest album - 专辑名：星空梦游.
Not only does the melody captivates me, the verses of the lyrics are something one can identify with. Track download
歌曲名：七十年后
妈妈 第—句开口说的话
怕怕 拨电话没有人接答
抱抱 或许很久才回来吧
原来这是需要一个人才有的牵挂
亲亲 忘记不重要的东西
笑笑 抱着最软弱的记忆 是你
拜拜 挥去要掉下 的泪滴
原来这是对爱 最痛最美丽的方式
Someday sometime when I have seen your face
难道 要闭眼前才再见
—场大雨—场泪
痛倒 痛澈了心扉
如果一刻能撑到永久
会是谁来陪我到最后
天上人间 记忆重重 不要
放在七十年后
白发苍苍才来 回眸
Someday sometime when I have seen your face
谁能 把时间当作拥有
—场大雨—场泪
痛倒 痛到心憔悴
如果—刻能撑到永久
会是你来陪我到最后
天上人间 来往匆匆 不要
放在七十年后
走到尽头来牵着手
如果那刻能撑到永久
会是你来陪我到最后
天上人间 来往匆匆 不要
放在七十年后
白发苍苍才来 回眸
在梦里彼岸的守候
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
My husband, so NOT a handy man...
In a marriage, one often assumed that the man of the household is the handy-man as well. Apparently NOT SO in mine...
I often sigh in despair or cringe in horror when I asked my partner to try to fix something. However, I have learnt my painful lessons that it is better off to leave any handy work unresolved than try to get my man to do it because whenever he is involved, double work for me is almost ensured. Not only do I have to fix the original problem, I often am faced with additional PROBLEM he caused. It's almost laughable and unimaginable, that my husband is more useless than me when it comes to fixing up household stuff. All he is useful for is brute strength.
I am often the one to patch things up, fixed the congested pipes, seal up gaps and holes and stick loosen furniture back together. At our old place where I grew up, I use to help my mum patch the toilet ceilings and paint over it. Tough and tiring job but I figure better me than my mum while my brothers were off serving army. Suddenly now, its like deja-vu except now I only have myself to lean on. Sometimes I wonder, so what if I am one of those "Help - I - am-feeble -I- cannot -do -anything - on- my -own" sort of woman? I often wonder how it feels like to claim inability to do anything and leave it to the man to do everything. Frankly, I'm torn between disgusted at that sort of helplessness, and yet a simmering envy that they can get away with it. SIGHHHHHhhhhhh..
Back to my "plight".
Just the other day, the lights in the bathroom as well as the dining room were blown. My partner said he would fix it but after 2 weekends, nothing happened of course. Fed up at the inaction and not the sort to repeat my request the 2nd time, I decided DIY was faster. I grabbed a step ladder to fix the living room bulbs. Easy breezy. However, when I step up to inspect the bathroom light, it was impossible to figure out how to open the casing, enclosing the bulb. It is one of those stupid design that you need to open the glass cover but no matter how I looked at it, I couldnt find an opening, so i pushed the casing back into the false ceiling.
I mentioned about the bulb casing to my husband that night. He said he would looked at it the next day sat. Comes sat, first I had to go get the ladder for him, and then he couldnt figure out either. My heart feared for the light as I saw him trying to force it open with tools and so I told him to stop it before he ruined the whole thing or I had a premonition I will end up having to replace the whole light than the bulb alone. He didnt answer me and I went off busying myself with other chores.
In less than 5 mins, he returned to the kitchen, and announced for unknown reason, ALL THE LIGHTS in the bathroom have blown. It would be unsurprising to say, I was rather ANNOYED. How could he have blown 2 other light source when I had already told him to stop? Secretly, I wished then I never got him involved. I told him to get it fix then as I was busy uncovering the oven hood to clean the fan.
After 20mins of silence, I went to check on the bathroom. The lights were still blown, and my husband was happily on the computer. It was as if informing me that the lights were blown has solved everything and his job was done. So instead of solving my initial problem, he had now CREATED more problems for me. With a silent groan, I was forced to make an extra trip to the supermarket (in the sudden drizzle) to grab the 2 other blown lights tubes. I came back, grabbed the ladder and replace the 2 light tube he had blown. All this time, he didnt even know I had left the house....When I was almost done, it was as if it dawn on my husband that his wife was too quiet and he spotted me in the bathroom. He volunteered to fix the lights which I firmly turn him down. Why bother to try to get started when I am already halfway done? When I fixed the lights and came down, he pat me on my back and grinned "My handy wife". I almost wanted to give him the death glare at his "audacity" and cheeky grin. Oh MAN!
Today, I wanted to snap a picture of the original blown light source and to my UTTER horror, I realised my dearest husband has CRACKED the whole glass cover of the bathroom light the other day. WTF! Now he added another new problem of having me to get someone to come fix it. And after all the trouble, he didnt even do anything to solve the original problem! What the hell! Short of tearing my hair out in frustrations, I covered my face in total resignation....
Whoever says it's handy to have a man at home? It's a freaking myth!
I often sigh in despair or cringe in horror when I asked my partner to try to fix something. However, I have learnt my painful lessons that it is better off to leave any handy work unresolved than try to get my man to do it because whenever he is involved, double work for me is almost ensured. Not only do I have to fix the original problem, I often am faced with additional PROBLEM he caused. It's almost laughable and unimaginable, that my husband is more useless than me when it comes to fixing up household stuff. All he is useful for is brute strength.
I am often the one to patch things up, fixed the congested pipes, seal up gaps and holes and stick loosen furniture back together. At our old place where I grew up, I use to help my mum patch the toilet ceilings and paint over it. Tough and tiring job but I figure better me than my mum while my brothers were off serving army. Suddenly now, its like deja-vu except now I only have myself to lean on. Sometimes I wonder, so what if I am one of those "Help - I - am-feeble -I- cannot -do -anything - on- my -own" sort of woman? I often wonder how it feels like to claim inability to do anything and leave it to the man to do everything. Frankly, I'm torn between disgusted at that sort of helplessness, and yet a simmering envy that they can get away with it. SIGHHHHHhhhhhh..
Back to my "plight".
Just the other day, the lights in the bathroom as well as the dining room were blown. My partner said he would fix it but after 2 weekends, nothing happened of course. Fed up at the inaction and not the sort to repeat my request the 2nd time, I decided DIY was faster. I grabbed a step ladder to fix the living room bulbs. Easy breezy. However, when I step up to inspect the bathroom light, it was impossible to figure out how to open the casing, enclosing the bulb. It is one of those stupid design that you need to open the glass cover but no matter how I looked at it, I couldnt find an opening, so i pushed the casing back into the false ceiling.
I mentioned about the bulb casing to my husband that night. He said he would looked at it the next day sat. Comes sat, first I had to go get the ladder for him, and then he couldnt figure out either. My heart feared for the light as I saw him trying to force it open with tools and so I told him to stop it before he ruined the whole thing or I had a premonition I will end up having to replace the whole light than the bulb alone. He didnt answer me and I went off busying myself with other chores.
In less than 5 mins, he returned to the kitchen, and announced for unknown reason, ALL THE LIGHTS in the bathroom have blown. It would be unsurprising to say, I was rather ANNOYED. How could he have blown 2 other light source when I had already told him to stop? Secretly, I wished then I never got him involved. I told him to get it fix then as I was busy uncovering the oven hood to clean the fan.
After 20mins of silence, I went to check on the bathroom. The lights were still blown, and my husband was happily on the computer. It was as if informing me that the lights were blown has solved everything and his job was done. So instead of solving my initial problem, he had now CREATED more problems for me. With a silent groan, I was forced to make an extra trip to the supermarket (in the sudden drizzle) to grab the 2 other blown lights tubes. I came back, grabbed the ladder and replace the 2 light tube he had blown. All this time, he didnt even know I had left the house....When I was almost done, it was as if it dawn on my husband that his wife was too quiet and he spotted me in the bathroom. He volunteered to fix the lights which I firmly turn him down. Why bother to try to get started when I am already halfway done? When I fixed the lights and came down, he pat me on my back and grinned "My handy wife". I almost wanted to give him the death glare at his "audacity" and cheeky grin. Oh MAN!
Today, I wanted to snap a picture of the original blown light source and to my UTTER horror, I realised my dearest husband has CRACKED the whole glass cover of the bathroom light the other day. WTF! Now he added another new problem of having me to get someone to come fix it. And after all the trouble, he didnt even do anything to solve the original problem! What the hell! Short of tearing my hair out in frustrations, I covered my face in total resignation....
Whoever says it's handy to have a man at home? It's a freaking myth!
Monday, April 27, 2009
Hating Singapore, isnt it a bit overdone?
Another eye catching, thought provoking recent news article on the now infamous "I hate Singapore" facebook group. Accordingly to the news snippet, most of the members are unsurprisingly our citizens, which in turn encouraged other expats to give in to their numerous rant and complaints about my country.
(news source: http://newpaper.asia1.com.sg/news/story/0,4136,199816-1240610340,00.html )
"The Facebook page says the creator is one Mr Wils Cheng . When The New Paper e-mailed to ask him why he set up the group, he simply referred us to the write-up on the group's Facebook page. He would not say if he is Singaporean. On whether he felt his group's stand was too harsh, Mr Cheng replied: 'I do regret that the name of the group may be 'harsh and unfair', but the things we advocate - free speech, free blogging, less restriction on art and expression, and cultural progress - are all positive.'"
Firstly what does he has to hide whether he is a singaporean? Afraid of repercusions? Is he a a true reformer at heart or coward in disguise?
Freedom of speech doesnt always equate to objective nor constructive airing of opinions. However, how many of those ranting out there are truly unbiased?Sure, in many ways Singapore is lacking and requires areas of improvement, but hey, which country is perfect? Is it really necessary to bash your own country and being so shamelesly unnationalistic? To set up a group to publicly humiliate your own birth place, really, does it make you a better qualified person to think that you have all sides of the stories especially when I suspect a good portion of the people may not even have experience residence in other continents before they shot off their mouth without regards.
I found it ironical at how China which has more human rights restrictions imposed on its citizens produced more nationalistic citizens than us. The chinese are profusingly genuinely proud of their own nation in comparsion. In face of any criticsims in the political or media arena, many times, China citizens from many parts would band together and stick it out defending their country, lashing at the negativity. Yet for Singaporeans who had it better in many aspects, often had nothing but disdain and public outcry against their own land, much eager to embrace the "renegade" badge as if it is some perverse honor. It is this public group of "thoughtless" people that I really loathe that makes others like us having to suffer the mockery by people of other nations, and having to defend ourselves in the face of slapping our own cheek by our own people.
Everyone in life shares different priorities of what is important to them, hence its up to a person how much one is willing to forgo in acceptance of the values that is dearest to their own heart. I have many expat friends living in Singapore and loving it because they can never imagine return to their own country may it Australia, London or New York. They would rather put up with bad English than return to the inconveniences they grow up in, or the unsafe environment where walking alone at night is unsafe, an underground tube that constantly breaks down, or the wet and gloomy expensive life that surrounds them. Overly passionate ciztiens aside, for those foreigners who had unreservedly shared their candid negative views, I hold nothing against them because they have every right to reject what was offered to them and return to their homeland which in turn have its own vices and flaws. However, the question that I wonder is how many of them have even truly tried to adapt or blend in with the locals without that "I am an expat attitude?"
As to the gripes of Ms Laila Allen from Australia, English may be our first working language medium but regardless how much our govt may try to promote it, it is not our NATIVE language (mother tongue) that is if you havent come to realise in your stay in Singapore. Due to our diverse cultural ethnicity, we need a non offensive neutral common language to communicate - hence English. Yet to many, most of all revert to the language which we are most comfortable with in either Mandarin, Cantonese, Hokkien, Teochew, Hakka, Tamil, or Malay etc when we aint working. Yes it is no excuse for bad pronunciation nor grammatical errors when it comes to service industry, however it is apparent that many of our service staff are not highly educated people. They may not necessary have all had the fortune of a good education and what's more, they most probably come from families where English may not be the main medium at home, nor least of all gone to a top school where one could mouth off English perfectly without your so call bad accent. Plus I do resent the fact that the person you are criticising could jolly well be someone Else's mother, brother or sister who does not have the luxury of a proper education. Rather than be judgemental, think about all those poor old aunties and uncle who have to pick up another working language just to find work in this modern society before one starts to pass a sweeping condemnation on all working staff.
I fail to believe all Singaporeans speak badly. Sure there are many where even I would cringe hearing them but I certainly can vouch for numerous Singaporeans who had fantastic spoken English. And as for accent, does one personally think that the thick Australian Queensland English or the Ireland's slang is anything easier nor understandable to other foreigners?
Perhaps Australia is luckier in the sense that their ancestors are of prisoner stock from London, combined with working class migrants from other European countries, hence inheriting the mixture of Cockney, Irish and Welsh, Germany accent. Singapore on the other hand are descendants from of migrants from different part of China, India and Asia states and hence English has never been part of our heritage until we were colonised, which even then, still was a language for the rich and not the common folks. Hence having a weird varied form of accent differing from many other western countries where English is deeply entrenched for centuries is thus comprehensible. We may not have perfect crisp Queens English, nor the nasal American accent for most of the lot but for the last 44 years since English was introduced to our curriculum, and moving on I believe we are getting there, through the evolution of generations combined with the influx of more westerners to taking up residency. However, one has to bear in mind that our society will always be formed by different tier of classes and those who are perfect in English would unlikely be found to be serving in a restaurant, supermarket, receptionist or fronting the desk of a customer service (with exception to citibank customer service perhaps) unless it is a part time job.
On the other matter, just because one asked a question in English in foreign land, one shouldn't arrogantly presume and expect everyone to reply in English, least of all perfect English. If someone continued to speak mandarin or any other foreign language to you, it doesnt mean they do not care about your existence. At times, they are trying to help and hoping in a tiny chance you can make sense of their conversation. When I was in Japan and once asked a (5 star) hotel staff a question in English, he started out feebly in grammatically incorrect English and started to talk in Japanese to himself, to his colleague and to me, desperately hoping hope against hope I may be able to make sense. I am not offended just because he is speaking Japanese to me when I had asked in English. And neither am i critical at the fact that he wasnt able to speak English fluently in a 5 start hotel. In Hong Kong, you can speak English but when you meet someone who doesnt or not quite fluently, they too would also quickly revert back to speaking in Cantonese and fretting about how to convey a point. In Paris, I got misdirected and people tried to point me back in French even though I know they can speak English. Yet I was never offended. Hence the point is, if you dont understand what other people are saying to you, dont point the fingers at others expecting people to accommodate your language. Instead, while in ROME, do what the ROMANS do, go pick up another language, at least basic speech to get you by. If you succeed in acclimatising yourself to the host country, you will in turn be richly rewarded with warmer service and an easier time. When I went back to Japan with the ability to speak their language, the already impeccable service was raised several levels especially by service staff who are not fluent in English and appreciating the simple gesture. The point is , Dont just rave and rant and expect other people to give in to your language medium. If you can speak their language, you would bound to discover how much easier your life will be in a foreign land. I have seen many expats living overseas turn their nose up at the locals and congregate associating amongst themselves, bitching and complaining about matters that would have easily resolve / dissolve if they would learn to integrate with the locals, which obviously was too much to ask from them.
Singapore never professed to be a western country, our national anthem isnt even English. At heart, we are a mix lot, mixed heritage living together. English is only but our common business language. So if one comes across another person on the street, I personally feel that the person is NOT obliged to reply you in English or even be fluent in it. This is NOT to excuse poor linguistic skills in the general public and especially the service industry (which I do concur requires huge improvement but who is going to pay for their British council courses?) but to pin the blame on the whole nation, I think is a little too much. Unless ALL our educational teachers are native English speakers, or had gone through British council course (would parents like to pick up a more expensive school fee tab?) to improve their speech, this situation of weird Singapore accents will always remain a cyclical challenge. What's more, should the huge influx of continuous tourists from China pumping so much cash into western countries expect them to be fluent in Mandarin in the service industry as well if that is the argument to go by? Hong Kong is a good example of a country doing that and no one is faulting their less than perfect Mandarin accent. Hong Kong is colonised by the Brits far longer than Singapore and yet Cantonese remained their main language medium and English is horridly indecent by far and large, situation not helped by the teaching medium swapped to Mandarin in schools years back since the reunification with China. So why is Singapore beating ourselves up so badly in comparison?
There is a difference between airing the gaps and pushing for improvements vs downright negating and turning your back on your own nationality.
I have lived in Australia myself and the English of many people there are neither perfect nor always pristine grammatically correct even if it's their first and ONLY language. And yes, while I readily agree that the Australian staff are friendlier, and warmer, however that does not equate to competency either. I too have my endless fair share of rants about service in Sydney to the point that I often wonder if one should abolish the "welfare allowance" or that the unions are not wielding too much power to the point that the staff doesnt care about what is "customer oriented service", nor do they care about what is call after sales service. Such complacency to me is much more deplorable than an "incompetent singapore staff" who may not know how to handle a question but had the decency to rope in their manager to address any complaints of the staff. In David Jones Sydney, I had the fortunate experience of a male staff who served us halfway but decided that it was time for his smoking break, and no qualms to leave us waitin for good 30-45mins while he scooted out without a word. When we enquired for the followup, no one had a clue, and no one bothered to locate any floor manager if there was even one. When the staff returned, no apologies, no concerns. Whatever we asked, he had no idea and couldnt care less. In another instance, the female staff were just chatting and chatting and couldnt care less that I was in a hurry to pay and go. In another instance where I was promised white goods delivery, and only to have the guys dumping it on my doorstep saying that carrying it into the apartment or assembly is NOT their job, not giving a damn if a single woman could even carry the heavy goods in that require 3 big blokes to handle. So how is Sydney any better when it comes to service quality? Perfect English alone doesnt redeem bad service either nor gain any affections in my books. I rather have someone who is half arsed in English but get the job done without me fretting or getting annoyed with the blatant "couldnt care less" attitude. Hence I think it is a bit rich for any Australians to complain about service in Singapore or any other Asia countries for a fact.
A good portion of westerners may have learned a 2nd / 3rd language but that good portion has never master it well either. I take Kevin Rudd as an outstanding exception. However, even with a chinese son-in-law, how many in his family are able to speak mandarin well? We take a look at a good portion of Australians, which many are not able to speak another language apart from English, not even when they have Aboriginal people in their own backyard and a substantial number of Asians in their community. What is worse is they are still fighting discrimination of the locals against the aboriginals the land they had cruelly stolen from. A good portion of American likewise in a similar position, where English is the only dominant language despite the fact they are a melting pot of other ethnic races like the Hispanic etc. The point I am trying to make here is that there are many groups of people out there who felt so discriminated against to a point that it was a cheering fact that a non-white president has been elected. Hence. shouldnt there be more hate group out there from other countries then to rant about the inequality, discriminating and judgemental society they live in compared to the peeving, trival matters that had been raised in this "I hate singapore" group?
While it is natural and almost 2nd nature to have tons of grievances, contentions about nagging issues,and exasperation's over flaws of a country, however it is childish and petty, even bordering on ingrate for any citizens to declare an open hatred for your own country over such inane matters (unless someone has a political agenda to it which makes it a separate matter). People who constantly gripe about Singapore laws, I often throw back a question, why should strict laws offend anyone who doesnt seek to act out a crime? Incidentally to the ignorant foreigner, personal consumption of gum is not an offence, the sale of it is.
Living in other countries, one also has to pay (different) taxes, abide by another set of laws, work, sleep, eat, watch TV, hang out at cinema cafes malls and beach. What's the big difference? For those complaining of the lack of fun and scenery, go get a great job, and that's what paid holidays and travelling are for. Dont just take for a week or two and gleam only the surface of pretty things, try roughing it out and perhaps some exposure of other people's way of lives in another country would do you a little good and widen your shallow narrow horizon. I had a friend who once told me the difficulty she had locating a rental apartment because no one wanted to rent to a non Japanese, regardless how good her track records may be. Or doesn anyone know the sort of "social" class a working woman at work has in Japan a well civilised country?I was shocked by such a given alienation. People in Sg doesnt know how good they have it despite our country's imperfections.
As for those who carelessly and unreservedly stamp their disapproval and hatred towards Singapore so much, one has to rem there are always 2 sides to a coin and rem the old saying, where the pasture is always greener on the other side but isnt necessary so when you actually do step across.
sidetrack: It's always sad to have a bunch of born and bred people doing their own country bashing without needing some other people to do it... and also to be the only country consisting of a handful of ethically chinese citizens turning their back against their own mandarin mother tongue, finding it a chore to master it... it is at this point where I often envy other countries that produces generations of nationalistics of citizens, even if their logic is at times out of whack.
(news source: http://newpaper.asia1.com.sg/news/story/0,4136,199816-1240610340,00.html )
"The Facebook page says the creator is one Mr Wils Cheng . When The New Paper e-mailed to ask him why he set up the group, he simply referred us to the write-up on the group's Facebook page. He would not say if he is Singaporean. On whether he felt his group's stand was too harsh, Mr Cheng replied: 'I do regret that the name of the group may be 'harsh and unfair', but the things we advocate - free speech, free blogging, less restriction on art and expression, and cultural progress - are all positive.'"
Firstly what does he has to hide whether he is a singaporean? Afraid of repercusions? Is he a a true reformer at heart or coward in disguise?
Freedom of speech doesnt always equate to objective nor constructive airing of opinions. However, how many of those ranting out there are truly unbiased?Sure, in many ways Singapore is lacking and requires areas of improvement, but hey, which country is perfect? Is it really necessary to bash your own country and being so shamelesly unnationalistic? To set up a group to publicly humiliate your own birth place, really, does it make you a better qualified person to think that you have all sides of the stories especially when I suspect a good portion of the people may not even have experience residence in other continents before they shot off their mouth without regards.
I found it ironical at how China which has more human rights restrictions imposed on its citizens produced more nationalistic citizens than us. The chinese are profusingly genuinely proud of their own nation in comparsion. In face of any criticsims in the political or media arena, many times, China citizens from many parts would band together and stick it out defending their country, lashing at the negativity. Yet for Singaporeans who had it better in many aspects, often had nothing but disdain and public outcry against their own land, much eager to embrace the "renegade" badge as if it is some perverse honor. It is this public group of "thoughtless" people that I really loathe that makes others like us having to suffer the mockery by people of other nations, and having to defend ourselves in the face of slapping our own cheek by our own people.
Everyone in life shares different priorities of what is important to them, hence its up to a person how much one is willing to forgo in acceptance of the values that is dearest to their own heart. I have many expat friends living in Singapore and loving it because they can never imagine return to their own country may it Australia, London or New York. They would rather put up with bad English than return to the inconveniences they grow up in, or the unsafe environment where walking alone at night is unsafe, an underground tube that constantly breaks down, or the wet and gloomy expensive life that surrounds them. Overly passionate ciztiens aside, for those foreigners who had unreservedly shared their candid negative views, I hold nothing against them because they have every right to reject what was offered to them and return to their homeland which in turn have its own vices and flaws. However, the question that I wonder is how many of them have even truly tried to adapt or blend in with the locals without that "I am an expat attitude?"
As to the gripes of Ms Laila Allen from Australia, English may be our first working language medium but regardless how much our govt may try to promote it, it is not our NATIVE language (mother tongue) that is if you havent come to realise in your stay in Singapore. Due to our diverse cultural ethnicity, we need a non offensive neutral common language to communicate - hence English. Yet to many, most of all revert to the language which we are most comfortable with in either Mandarin, Cantonese, Hokkien, Teochew, Hakka, Tamil, or Malay etc when we aint working. Yes it is no excuse for bad pronunciation nor grammatical errors when it comes to service industry, however it is apparent that many of our service staff are not highly educated people. They may not necessary have all had the fortune of a good education and what's more, they most probably come from families where English may not be the main medium at home, nor least of all gone to a top school where one could mouth off English perfectly without your so call bad accent. Plus I do resent the fact that the person you are criticising could jolly well be someone Else's mother, brother or sister who does not have the luxury of a proper education. Rather than be judgemental, think about all those poor old aunties and uncle who have to pick up another working language just to find work in this modern society before one starts to pass a sweeping condemnation on all working staff.
I fail to believe all Singaporeans speak badly. Sure there are many where even I would cringe hearing them but I certainly can vouch for numerous Singaporeans who had fantastic spoken English. And as for accent, does one personally think that the thick Australian Queensland English or the Ireland's slang is anything easier nor understandable to other foreigners?
Perhaps Australia is luckier in the sense that their ancestors are of prisoner stock from London, combined with working class migrants from other European countries, hence inheriting the mixture of Cockney, Irish and Welsh, Germany accent. Singapore on the other hand are descendants from of migrants from different part of China, India and Asia states and hence English has never been part of our heritage until we were colonised, which even then, still was a language for the rich and not the common folks. Hence having a weird varied form of accent differing from many other western countries where English is deeply entrenched for centuries is thus comprehensible. We may not have perfect crisp Queens English, nor the nasal American accent for most of the lot but for the last 44 years since English was introduced to our curriculum, and moving on I believe we are getting there, through the evolution of generations combined with the influx of more westerners to taking up residency. However, one has to bear in mind that our society will always be formed by different tier of classes and those who are perfect in English would unlikely be found to be serving in a restaurant, supermarket, receptionist or fronting the desk of a customer service (with exception to citibank customer service perhaps) unless it is a part time job.
On the other matter, just because one asked a question in English in foreign land, one shouldn't arrogantly presume and expect everyone to reply in English, least of all perfect English. If someone continued to speak mandarin or any other foreign language to you, it doesnt mean they do not care about your existence. At times, they are trying to help and hoping in a tiny chance you can make sense of their conversation. When I was in Japan and once asked a (5 star) hotel staff a question in English, he started out feebly in grammatically incorrect English and started to talk in Japanese to himself, to his colleague and to me, desperately hoping hope against hope I may be able to make sense. I am not offended just because he is speaking Japanese to me when I had asked in English. And neither am i critical at the fact that he wasnt able to speak English fluently in a 5 start hotel. In Hong Kong, you can speak English but when you meet someone who doesnt or not quite fluently, they too would also quickly revert back to speaking in Cantonese and fretting about how to convey a point. In Paris, I got misdirected and people tried to point me back in French even though I know they can speak English. Yet I was never offended. Hence the point is, if you dont understand what other people are saying to you, dont point the fingers at others expecting people to accommodate your language. Instead, while in ROME, do what the ROMANS do, go pick up another language, at least basic speech to get you by. If you succeed in acclimatising yourself to the host country, you will in turn be richly rewarded with warmer service and an easier time. When I went back to Japan with the ability to speak their language, the already impeccable service was raised several levels especially by service staff who are not fluent in English and appreciating the simple gesture. The point is , Dont just rave and rant and expect other people to give in to your language medium. If you can speak their language, you would bound to discover how much easier your life will be in a foreign land. I have seen many expats living overseas turn their nose up at the locals and congregate associating amongst themselves, bitching and complaining about matters that would have easily resolve / dissolve if they would learn to integrate with the locals, which obviously was too much to ask from them.
Singapore never professed to be a western country, our national anthem isnt even English. At heart, we are a mix lot, mixed heritage living together. English is only but our common business language. So if one comes across another person on the street, I personally feel that the person is NOT obliged to reply you in English or even be fluent in it. This is NOT to excuse poor linguistic skills in the general public and especially the service industry (which I do concur requires huge improvement but who is going to pay for their British council courses?) but to pin the blame on the whole nation, I think is a little too much. Unless ALL our educational teachers are native English speakers, or had gone through British council course (would parents like to pick up a more expensive school fee tab?) to improve their speech, this situation of weird Singapore accents will always remain a cyclical challenge. What's more, should the huge influx of continuous tourists from China pumping so much cash into western countries expect them to be fluent in Mandarin in the service industry as well if that is the argument to go by? Hong Kong is a good example of a country doing that and no one is faulting their less than perfect Mandarin accent. Hong Kong is colonised by the Brits far longer than Singapore and yet Cantonese remained their main language medium and English is horridly indecent by far and large, situation not helped by the teaching medium swapped to Mandarin in schools years back since the reunification with China. So why is Singapore beating ourselves up so badly in comparison?
There is a difference between airing the gaps and pushing for improvements vs downright negating and turning your back on your own nationality.
I have lived in Australia myself and the English of many people there are neither perfect nor always pristine grammatically correct even if it's their first and ONLY language. And yes, while I readily agree that the Australian staff are friendlier, and warmer, however that does not equate to competency either. I too have my endless fair share of rants about service in Sydney to the point that I often wonder if one should abolish the "welfare allowance" or that the unions are not wielding too much power to the point that the staff doesnt care about what is "customer oriented service", nor do they care about what is call after sales service. Such complacency to me is much more deplorable than an "incompetent singapore staff" who may not know how to handle a question but had the decency to rope in their manager to address any complaints of the staff. In David Jones Sydney, I had the fortunate experience of a male staff who served us halfway but decided that it was time for his smoking break, and no qualms to leave us waitin for good 30-45mins while he scooted out without a word. When we enquired for the followup, no one had a clue, and no one bothered to locate any floor manager if there was even one. When the staff returned, no apologies, no concerns. Whatever we asked, he had no idea and couldnt care less. In another instance, the female staff were just chatting and chatting and couldnt care less that I was in a hurry to pay and go. In another instance where I was promised white goods delivery, and only to have the guys dumping it on my doorstep saying that carrying it into the apartment or assembly is NOT their job, not giving a damn if a single woman could even carry the heavy goods in that require 3 big blokes to handle. So how is Sydney any better when it comes to service quality? Perfect English alone doesnt redeem bad service either nor gain any affections in my books. I rather have someone who is half arsed in English but get the job done without me fretting or getting annoyed with the blatant "couldnt care less" attitude. Hence I think it is a bit rich for any Australians to complain about service in Singapore or any other Asia countries for a fact.
A good portion of westerners may have learned a 2nd / 3rd language but that good portion has never master it well either. I take Kevin Rudd as an outstanding exception. However, even with a chinese son-in-law, how many in his family are able to speak mandarin well? We take a look at a good portion of Australians, which many are not able to speak another language apart from English, not even when they have Aboriginal people in their own backyard and a substantial number of Asians in their community. What is worse is they are still fighting discrimination of the locals against the aboriginals the land they had cruelly stolen from. A good portion of American likewise in a similar position, where English is the only dominant language despite the fact they are a melting pot of other ethnic races like the Hispanic etc. The point I am trying to make here is that there are many groups of people out there who felt so discriminated against to a point that it was a cheering fact that a non-white president has been elected. Hence. shouldnt there be more hate group out there from other countries then to rant about the inequality, discriminating and judgemental society they live in compared to the peeving, trival matters that had been raised in this "I hate singapore" group?
While it is natural and almost 2nd nature to have tons of grievances, contentions about nagging issues,and exasperation's over flaws of a country, however it is childish and petty, even bordering on ingrate for any citizens to declare an open hatred for your own country over such inane matters (unless someone has a political agenda to it which makes it a separate matter). People who constantly gripe about Singapore laws, I often throw back a question, why should strict laws offend anyone who doesnt seek to act out a crime? Incidentally to the ignorant foreigner, personal consumption of gum is not an offence, the sale of it is.
Living in other countries, one also has to pay (different) taxes, abide by another set of laws, work, sleep, eat, watch TV, hang out at cinema cafes malls and beach. What's the big difference? For those complaining of the lack of fun and scenery, go get a great job, and that's what paid holidays and travelling are for. Dont just take for a week or two and gleam only the surface of pretty things, try roughing it out and perhaps some exposure of other people's way of lives in another country would do you a little good and widen your shallow narrow horizon. I had a friend who once told me the difficulty she had locating a rental apartment because no one wanted to rent to a non Japanese, regardless how good her track records may be. Or doesn anyone know the sort of "social" class a working woman at work has in Japan a well civilised country?I was shocked by such a given alienation. People in Sg doesnt know how good they have it despite our country's imperfections.
As for those who carelessly and unreservedly stamp their disapproval and hatred towards Singapore so much, one has to rem there are always 2 sides to a coin and rem the old saying, where the pasture is always greener on the other side but isnt necessary so when you actually do step across.
sidetrack: It's always sad to have a bunch of born and bred people doing their own country bashing without needing some other people to do it... and also to be the only country consisting of a handful of ethically chinese citizens turning their back against their own mandarin mother tongue, finding it a chore to master it... it is at this point where I often envy other countries that produces generations of nationalistics of citizens, even if their logic is at times out of whack.
Saturday, April 25, 2009
C-Music: Fish Leong Love Song
I dont normally buy Mandarin albums but the latest release by Fish Leong is really good. Almost all the songs are easy to like. This is my current favorite.
梁静茹 - 情歌 (Download)
梁静茹 - 情歌 (Download)
Friday, April 24, 2009
Naked romp shames SMAP boy band star Tsuyoshi Kusanagi and puts media in spin
Another celebrity shocker arrest - Kusanagi from SMAP! No doubt at least for me! He is one of my fav SMAP member more than the other pretty boy. Poor chap. I hope he was just desperately overworked down to the bones and drunk, and hopefully not on drugs...
Japan is a suppressed country as widely known and merciless against people who flaunt the society rules...If he is clear from any drug abuse, hope someone will really cut this chap some slack.
Source From Times Online
The Japanese media world has been plunged into chaos by the humiliating arrest of Tsuyoshi Kusanagi — a member of SMAP, the biggest, best-loved and most successful boy band in Japanese pop history.
Famed for his boyish good looks, and a repeated winner of the “Mr Jeans Japan” accolade, Kusanagi was bundled into a police car after a night of naked, sake-fuelled mayhem in a central Tokyo park.
“What’s wrong with being naked?” the music and television superstar is said to have screamed as the arresting officers dodged his flailing fists and attempted to wrap him in a plastic tarpaulin.
Such is the 34-year old celebrity’s fame and media profile that his arrest on charges of indecent exposure has already taken on a political dimension. Kunio Hatoyama, the Minister for Internal Affairs and Communications, was reportedly “furious” at the indiscretion and threatened to drop the singer from one of the biggest public information campaigns that the Government has mounted.
A noted collector of vintage denims, Mr Kusanagi is understood to have stripped completely and strewn his clothes around the park before sitting cross-legged on the grass and, said neighbours, “whooping noisily”. Having allegedly spent most of the night drinking with two friends in a nearby bar, he was reportedly alone when the police arrived on the scene at about 3am.
The bizarre incident — the star said today that he could not remember why he took his clothes off — is expected to have huge repercussions and blows a potentially huge hole in the Japanese prime-time television schedules.
As by far the most popular boy band, the five members of SMAP are also among the busiest of all Japanese media celebrities — a class of entertainer that work freakishly long hours and are contractually obliged to perform in any programme or event that their powerful talent agencies dictate.
In common with the other four members of SMAP, Kusanagi appears on a weekly cookery and variety show and five other regular weekly shows. He also makes numerous non-regular weekly appearances across all six terrestrial channels, most of them in prime-time slots. A punishing schedule of studio recording sessions and other promotional work is fitted around that.
As news of the naked arrest swept across Japan’s evening tabloid press, an army of advertisers and television producers were forced to reconsider their use of a “boy next door” figure who has been an absolutely safe bet for nearly two decades.
Both Toyota and Procter & Gamble immediately cancelled advertising campaigns that used Kusanagi, and television channels said that they were considering their position: a complex tussle between the expected public outrage and the solidity of SMAP’s historic effect on viewer ratings.
Worse still is the damage it has done to the Government’s expensive public information campaign. Selected as a clean-cut poster-boy in mid-2006, Kusanagi was made the centrepiece of a giant government drive to prepare the public for the impending conversion from terrestrial to digital television broadcasting. In the role as “digital ambassador”, he has appeared on more than 50,000 posters and a million pamphlets and appeared in 128,000 television advertising slots.
Visibly enraged, Mr Hatoyama said: “the act is shameful for a person who is asking the public to shoulder a financial burden of buying new televisions to prepare for the shift”.
The effect of the arrest has already been felt in South Korea, where Kusanagi’s fluent Korean has earned him thousands of loyal, passionate fans. News of the arrest was the top item on at least two Korean television news programmes this afternoon.
Famed for his boyish good looks, and a repeated winner of the “Mr Jeans Japan” accolade, Kusanagi was bundled into a police car after a night of naked, sake-fuelled mayhem in a central Tokyo park.
“What’s wrong with being naked?” the music and television superstar is said to have screamed as the arresting officers dodged his flailing fists and attempted to wrap him in a plastic tarpaulin.
Such is the 34-year old celebrity’s fame and media profile that his arrest on charges of indecent exposure has already taken on a political dimension. Kunio Hatoyama, the Minister for Internal Affairs and Communications, was reportedly “furious” at the indiscretion and threatened to drop the singer from one of the biggest public information campaigns that the Government has mounted.
A noted collector of vintage denims, Mr Kusanagi is understood to have stripped completely and strewn his clothes around the park before sitting cross-legged on the grass and, said neighbours, “whooping noisily”. Having allegedly spent most of the night drinking with two friends in a nearby bar, he was reportedly alone when the police arrived on the scene at about 3am.
The bizarre incident — the star said today that he could not remember why he took his clothes off — is expected to have huge repercussions and blows a potentially huge hole in the Japanese prime-time television schedules.
As by far the most popular boy band, the five members of SMAP are also among the busiest of all Japanese media celebrities — a class of entertainer that work freakishly long hours and are contractually obliged to perform in any programme or event that their powerful talent agencies dictate.
In common with the other four members of SMAP, Kusanagi appears on a weekly cookery and variety show and five other regular weekly shows. He also makes numerous non-regular weekly appearances across all six terrestrial channels, most of them in prime-time slots. A punishing schedule of studio recording sessions and other promotional work is fitted around that.
As news of the naked arrest swept across Japan’s evening tabloid press, an army of advertisers and television producers were forced to reconsider their use of a “boy next door” figure who has been an absolutely safe bet for nearly two decades.
Both Toyota and Procter & Gamble immediately cancelled advertising campaigns that used Kusanagi, and television channels said that they were considering their position: a complex tussle between the expected public outrage and the solidity of SMAP’s historic effect on viewer ratings.
Worse still is the damage it has done to the Government’s expensive public information campaign. Selected as a clean-cut poster-boy in mid-2006, Kusanagi was made the centrepiece of a giant government drive to prepare the public for the impending conversion from terrestrial to digital television broadcasting. In the role as “digital ambassador”, he has appeared on more than 50,000 posters and a million pamphlets and appeared in 128,000 television advertising slots.
Visibly enraged, Mr Hatoyama said: “the act is shameful for a person who is asking the public to shoulder a financial burden of buying new televisions to prepare for the shift”.
The effect of the arrest has already been felt in South Korea, where Kusanagi’s fluent Korean has earned him thousands of loyal, passionate fans. News of the arrest was the top item on at least two Korean television news programmes this afternoon.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
C-music: 别再为他流泪 (Fish Leong)
别再为他流泪
你走了太久一定很累
他錯了不該你來面對
離開他就好就算了
心情很乾脆
他其實沒有那麼絕對
遠一點你就看出真偽
離開他不等於你的世界會崩潰
轉個彎你還能飛
就別再為他流淚
別再讓他操控你的傷悲
就算有一點愚昧一點點後悔
也不要太狼狽
他不值得你的淚
把那遺憾留在大雨的街
你曾在迷失的旅途中盲目追
以後為自己醉
每段感情都非常珍貴
他的好你就放在心扉
記得有個人曾讓你那樣的心醉
你笑了照亮夜幕的黑
什麼夢都不比你的美
多少年以後想起他還有些體會
那些你已無所謂
就別再為他流淚
別再讓他操控你的傷悲
就算有一點愚昧一點點後悔
也不要太狼狽他不值得你的淚
把那遺憾留在大雨的街
你曾在迷失的旅途中盲目追
以後為自己醉
就別再為他流淚
別再讓他操控你的傷悲
就算有一點愚昧一點點後悔
也不要太狼狽
他不值得你的淚
把那遺憾留在大雨的街
你曾在迷失的旅途中盲目追
以後管他是誰
他錯了不該你來面對
離開他就好就算了
心情很乾脆
他其實沒有那麼絕對
遠一點你就看出真偽
離開他不等於你的世界會崩潰
轉個彎你還能飛
就別再為他流淚
別再讓他操控你的傷悲
就算有一點愚昧一點點後悔
也不要太狼狽
他不值得你的淚
把那遺憾留在大雨的街
你曾在迷失的旅途中盲目追
以後為自己醉
每段感情都非常珍貴
他的好你就放在心扉
記得有個人曾讓你那樣的心醉
你笑了照亮夜幕的黑
什麼夢都不比你的美
多少年以後想起他還有些體會
那些你已無所謂
就別再為他流淚
別再讓他操控你的傷悲
就算有一點愚昧一點點後悔
也不要太狼狽他不值得你的淚
把那遺憾留在大雨的街
你曾在迷失的旅途中盲目追
以後為自己醉
就別再為他流淚
別再讓他操控你的傷悲
就算有一點愚昧一點點後悔
也不要太狼狽
他不值得你的淚
把那遺憾留在大雨的街
你曾在迷失的旅途中盲目追
以後管他是誰
************************
「败犬女王- 梁静如 (download)」
Exasperated with love clueless people
Patience and dealing with "stupidity" has never been my forte, especially so when I found myself in situations needing to mince my words such as to protect the fragile heart or ego of the people in question.
Age has seriously erode my compassion for the ridiculous naivety of some people, and my decreasing willingness to make logic out of illogical situations I had heard. Indirectly, it also intensify the sharpness of the advice dished out when solicited. I figure "if you are going to act stupid, then you are asking for it."
Sometimes, I wondered to myself, how much are we hardwired genetically to be able to deal with emotional matters? I agree love is blind, and we have no say in who we fall in love with. However, how does one go about dealing with matters of the heart, it has to be 70% experience and intellectual rational logic combined isnt it? So at times, when I see girls acting STUPIDLY with their love live, I groaned in despair especially when it involved friends.
My sudden rant today comes about due to the unsuspecting receipt of a self-indulgent whiny whimpering mail disguised in the form of a long message from an girlfriend. I like to give her some credit, I really do but right now this moment, apart from exasperation at her behaviour and strange thoughts, it's pretty hard to have anything else nice to say.
This female friend is several years younger. She is fundamentally a nice girl but unfortunately, has always been idealistic and simplistic in her views of things. To make matters worse, she often over romanticise things and act impulsively without logic nor reason. To be fair, she doesnt have much experience in love and it has been over 6 years since she broke off with her first exbf from school. However in the years I have known her, I have never seen her make a single sensible decision when it comes to love, and I have lost count of the times I have encouraged her, to the lecturing, counselling and reprimands. To a point, she knew she was upsetting me with the frivolous ways and obvious disregard to her own standing, as a decent girl.
I tried explaining to her. If she don’t see herself an loveable and respectable person, how does she expect someone else to feel the same and love her ? If she don’t consider herself worthy of someone, will she ever be? So yeah, sometimes even when we do think we’re worthy but things fail, yet the chances of reciprocity are much greater when we have a belief in an idea than when we don’t isnt it? Plus, doesnt she see how wrong it is to keep expecting somebody else to give her happiness, when the one person who really should is herself.
I know she has a mild inferior complex because of her slight chubbiness. I know she wants that romantic love, that strong yearning yet combined with a huge ego. Not the best combination for a simple minded person. She is not stupid, but she acts stupid when it comes to love in her life and I simply am losing patience with her constant inability to hold her ground. Why do people behave the way they do? Was my mincing of words doing her more harm than good? Of course I am mindful that she is the mistress of her own life and she is the only one who can take charge of it. Yet, sometimes, I honestly dread hearing those dead corners she constantly steered herself into.
It is naturally understandable for her to fear rejection. Yet, her constant jumping to conclusion is absurd. In the past, she sought solace in partying every weekend, hoping to find a Mr Right, her soulmate in a club. I had told her a million times, statistcally, it's almost impossible to find true love from strangers while partying. A causal fling, one night stand yeah sure aplenty, true love? Forget it. Then again causal fling isnt her thing either because she lacks control of her emotions and she simply becomes a pawn- readily. So everytime she met someone in a club, it always almost definitely ends up as a nitemare or a despairing disappointment time and again. She always ended up feeling cheated. What does she expect? All the guy *cough* jerks *cough* who chatted her up are often only up for one thing - causal flings, though fling is truly an over-generous use of word here. It's sooooo glaringly obvious to anyone hearing her enounters but she was naively blind to it and plunges straight off the cliff despite my best efforts to reign her in. In most situations, its most certainly too late because she would only confide in me when the deed is done and I would hold myself from strangling her and screaming "WTF are u thinking". It's pointless to get all blue in the face because she knows its a lost cause but she wont want to admit it. So instead, she clung on desperately to a false hope that "she will be the one" to change him, to attract him into making her the "last one". One of the worst thing a woman can wish for, is to change a man. Why do some woman never learn - that "A man will never change because you want him to, he will only truly change if HE wants to." It's such a simple concept yet so hard to grasp for some. Hence, she will delude herself for months, getting toyed with, and finally end everything in tears, like a dog with tail between its leg conceding she has been lied to once again. Can I seriously whipped any sense into this girl?
Finally in the year before I left, I gave her a thrashing down because being nice doesnt seem to do the trick. I asked her if she knew what was the difference between a fling and a whore and why was she so willing to be trampled all over and mishandled by all those jackarse in her silly quest for love. There is nothing wrong in craving or wanting love but its definitely not right to throw herrself at every man that comes along that shows her a little attention. Show some self respect. Perhaps age played a part, she seemed to get something in and stopped her partying ways. However, she still isnt thinking straight. She let her emotional state get the better of her.
Recently, she claimed she has found solace in God. Yeah right. I am skeptical, only because I never have much faith in people who so readily leap into it when they are lonely and unhappy. I doubt it is really God performing miracle but more lplausible that she enjoyed the cell group company keeping her mind occupied. Nothing wrong with that, just not the way I envisioned how one should embraced religion, being sucked into it because one is lonely rather than wanting to gain spiritual enlightenment. In th end, it isnt the bible content she is spendin time on but rather guys in church. Anycase religion aside, she confessed she once again fell for someone in her church cell group. She enjoyed all their conversations, all their phone and sms chats etc. Great....
That is until she fessed up that she decided to give him the cold shoulder for 2 weeks now and avoided him. My forehead creased into a frown and asked her why. She said she decided that it is better that way because she felt he was misleading her by being so nice to her. And if he was not interested, he should not be so warm and caring, and yet he did nothing to pursue her like after a month. She felt that rather than risking him telling her he isnt interested, it was better she strike first by creating the distance. Then she went on saying he is so smart and sensitive and he should know what he is doing to her. I so fking want to strangle her. When she went on to say they share the same horoscope, that was when I asked myself, what sort of crazy ideas lies inside that head of hers.
It was virtually impossible to contain my angst. So I blasted her and told her that her impulse is ruining everygood thing in her life. This isnt the first time that some decent nice guy is nice to her and she would turn on the cold shoulder move, I didnt know why she loves to jump to conclusion and her notion of love is so bizarre. She ignored him and yet she expect him to continue to call her, chase her and be mindful of her every move. She now wonders and harps on why he reacted the same by putting distance between them, reciprocating the ways she started it in the first place. In the first place, why does she always assume "friendliness equate love" and there wasnt room for platonic relationship. It is all so unbelievable that I can almost die from frustrations.
The question I asked her, wasnt this what she wanted by her stupid conclusion and action? So why does she feel like she is in a dilemma and awkwardness and asking me WHY IS HE behaving like this. What did she want? Is she still 16yrs old expecting to be woo like those stupid romance book? Is she expecting some sort of instant noodle speed romance? Those that explodes like firework and fizzle out in a flash too? Even if the guy did hold any possible liking, her body language had just signalled she wasnt interested. And if the guy was just a friend, all the more confusion and he would let her be. At least that is the situation I would rationalise. he isnt her, how on earth would he know what is she thinking?
It's so tiring to try explaining logic to someone illogical. She has lots to ponder and reflect but I doubt she will ever reach the state where she can see objectively where she has gone so wrong and why she "scare" every guy away.
She probably wont like what she is going to read tomorrow. For the first time, I finally blatantly called her acting stupid and behaving childishly. I seriously hope she will learn her lesson this time, pick herself up and move on.... though I have serious doubt about it. Sigh...
Age has seriously erode my compassion for the ridiculous naivety of some people, and my decreasing willingness to make logic out of illogical situations I had heard. Indirectly, it also intensify the sharpness of the advice dished out when solicited. I figure "if you are going to act stupid, then you are asking for it."
Sometimes, I wondered to myself, how much are we hardwired genetically to be able to deal with emotional matters? I agree love is blind, and we have no say in who we fall in love with. However, how does one go about dealing with matters of the heart, it has to be 70% experience and intellectual rational logic combined isnt it? So at times, when I see girls acting STUPIDLY with their love live, I groaned in despair especially when it involved friends.
My sudden rant today comes about due to the unsuspecting receipt of a self-indulgent whiny whimpering mail disguised in the form of a long message from an girlfriend. I like to give her some credit, I really do but right now this moment, apart from exasperation at her behaviour and strange thoughts, it's pretty hard to have anything else nice to say.
This female friend is several years younger. She is fundamentally a nice girl but unfortunately, has always been idealistic and simplistic in her views of things. To make matters worse, she often over romanticise things and act impulsively without logic nor reason. To be fair, she doesnt have much experience in love and it has been over 6 years since she broke off with her first exbf from school. However in the years I have known her, I have never seen her make a single sensible decision when it comes to love, and I have lost count of the times I have encouraged her, to the lecturing, counselling and reprimands. To a point, she knew she was upsetting me with the frivolous ways and obvious disregard to her own standing, as a decent girl.
I tried explaining to her. If she don’t see herself an loveable and respectable person, how does she expect someone else to feel the same and love her ? If she don’t consider herself worthy of someone, will she ever be? So yeah, sometimes even when we do think we’re worthy but things fail, yet the chances of reciprocity are much greater when we have a belief in an idea than when we don’t isnt it? Plus, doesnt she see how wrong it is to keep expecting somebody else to give her happiness, when the one person who really should is herself.
I know she has a mild inferior complex because of her slight chubbiness. I know she wants that romantic love, that strong yearning yet combined with a huge ego. Not the best combination for a simple minded person. She is not stupid, but she acts stupid when it comes to love in her life and I simply am losing patience with her constant inability to hold her ground. Why do people behave the way they do? Was my mincing of words doing her more harm than good? Of course I am mindful that she is the mistress of her own life and she is the only one who can take charge of it. Yet, sometimes, I honestly dread hearing those dead corners she constantly steered herself into.
It is naturally understandable for her to fear rejection. Yet, her constant jumping to conclusion is absurd. In the past, she sought solace in partying every weekend, hoping to find a Mr Right, her soulmate in a club. I had told her a million times, statistcally, it's almost impossible to find true love from strangers while partying. A causal fling, one night stand yeah sure aplenty, true love? Forget it. Then again causal fling isnt her thing either because she lacks control of her emotions and she simply becomes a pawn- readily. So everytime she met someone in a club, it always almost definitely ends up as a nitemare or a despairing disappointment time and again. She always ended up feeling cheated. What does she expect? All the guy *cough* jerks *cough* who chatted her up are often only up for one thing - causal flings, though fling is truly an over-generous use of word here. It's sooooo glaringly obvious to anyone hearing her enounters but she was naively blind to it and plunges straight off the cliff despite my best efforts to reign her in. In most situations, its most certainly too late because she would only confide in me when the deed is done and I would hold myself from strangling her and screaming "WTF are u thinking". It's pointless to get all blue in the face because she knows its a lost cause but she wont want to admit it. So instead, she clung on desperately to a false hope that "she will be the one" to change him, to attract him into making her the "last one". One of the worst thing a woman can wish for, is to change a man. Why do some woman never learn - that "A man will never change because you want him to, he will only truly change if HE wants to." It's such a simple concept yet so hard to grasp for some. Hence, she will delude herself for months, getting toyed with, and finally end everything in tears, like a dog with tail between its leg conceding she has been lied to once again. Can I seriously whipped any sense into this girl?
Finally in the year before I left, I gave her a thrashing down because being nice doesnt seem to do the trick. I asked her if she knew what was the difference between a fling and a whore and why was she so willing to be trampled all over and mishandled by all those jackarse in her silly quest for love. There is nothing wrong in craving or wanting love but its definitely not right to throw herrself at every man that comes along that shows her a little attention. Show some self respect. Perhaps age played a part, she seemed to get something in and stopped her partying ways. However, she still isnt thinking straight. She let her emotional state get the better of her.
Recently, she claimed she has found solace in God. Yeah right. I am skeptical, only because I never have much faith in people who so readily leap into it when they are lonely and unhappy. I doubt it is really God performing miracle but more lplausible that she enjoyed the cell group company keeping her mind occupied. Nothing wrong with that, just not the way I envisioned how one should embraced religion, being sucked into it because one is lonely rather than wanting to gain spiritual enlightenment. In th end, it isnt the bible content she is spendin time on but rather guys in church. Anycase religion aside, she confessed she once again fell for someone in her church cell group. She enjoyed all their conversations, all their phone and sms chats etc. Great....
That is until she fessed up that she decided to give him the cold shoulder for 2 weeks now and avoided him. My forehead creased into a frown and asked her why. She said she decided that it is better that way because she felt he was misleading her by being so nice to her. And if he was not interested, he should not be so warm and caring, and yet he did nothing to pursue her like after a month. She felt that rather than risking him telling her he isnt interested, it was better she strike first by creating the distance. Then she went on saying he is so smart and sensitive and he should know what he is doing to her. I so fking want to strangle her. When she went on to say they share the same horoscope, that was when I asked myself, what sort of crazy ideas lies inside that head of hers.
It was virtually impossible to contain my angst. So I blasted her and told her that her impulse is ruining everygood thing in her life. This isnt the first time that some decent nice guy is nice to her and she would turn on the cold shoulder move, I didnt know why she loves to jump to conclusion and her notion of love is so bizarre. She ignored him and yet she expect him to continue to call her, chase her and be mindful of her every move. She now wonders and harps on why he reacted the same by putting distance between them, reciprocating the ways she started it in the first place. In the first place, why does she always assume "friendliness equate love" and there wasnt room for platonic relationship. It is all so unbelievable that I can almost die from frustrations.
The question I asked her, wasnt this what she wanted by her stupid conclusion and action? So why does she feel like she is in a dilemma and awkwardness and asking me WHY IS HE behaving like this. What did she want? Is she still 16yrs old expecting to be woo like those stupid romance book? Is she expecting some sort of instant noodle speed romance? Those that explodes like firework and fizzle out in a flash too? Even if the guy did hold any possible liking, her body language had just signalled she wasnt interested. And if the guy was just a friend, all the more confusion and he would let her be. At least that is the situation I would rationalise. he isnt her, how on earth would he know what is she thinking?
It's so tiring to try explaining logic to someone illogical. She has lots to ponder and reflect but I doubt she will ever reach the state where she can see objectively where she has gone so wrong and why she "scare" every guy away.
She probably wont like what she is going to read tomorrow. For the first time, I finally blatantly called her acting stupid and behaving childishly. I seriously hope she will learn her lesson this time, pick herself up and move on.... though I have serious doubt about it. Sigh...
Friday, April 17, 2009
Susan Boyle - I Dreamed a Dream on Britains Got Talent
This is one woman who deserves a standing ovation!! Susan Boyle literally stunned the audience at Britain's Got Talent on April 11 when she sang "I Dreamed a Dream." She is one of those rare find where you jaws literally drop and her singing will blow u away, 47yrs old or not!
Check out her singing audition here.
Check out her singing audition here.
Travel Pixs: Osaka and Taipei
I know this is like belated...but oh well, I finally found time to upload the Osaka pictures and Taipei picture to share. (Of course u can skip if u are not interested :P ). I decided to forgo Flicker as it TAKES forever to upload so I'm sticking to Windows Live which is getting pretty good. damn Microsoft..U just have to hand it to them.
Didnt take much for Taipei since there photography was banned in The National palace Museum, and the rest of the time my hands were too full from carrying my mum's goodies....and mine too *sheepish*
Didnt take much for Taipei since there photography was banned in The National palace Museum, and the rest of the time my hands were too full from carrying my mum's goodies....and mine too *sheepish*
Saturday, April 11, 2009
C-Music: 妥協 [Jolin]
妥協
你 總愛編織謊言
我 負責配合表演
所有改變
只為了進入你的世界
這情節 重覆了一百遍
才發現 是你的心太野
你 劃定楚河漢界
我 不能輕易犯規
所有時間
都是先給了你優先權
不自覺 愛到不敢冒險
成了你的傀儡一年 兩年
才看見我有多狼狽
愛到妥協 到頭來還是無解
綁著你 不讓你飛
歷史不斷重演
我好累
愛到妥協 也無法將故事再重寫
你已下最後通牒 我躲在我的世界
你 劃定楚河漢界
我 不能輕易犯規
所有時間
都是先給了你優先權
不自覺 愛到不敢冒險
成了你的傀儡一年 兩年
才看見我有多狼狽
愛到妥協 到頭來還是無解
綁著你 不讓你飛
歷史不斷重演
我好累
愛到妥協 也無法將故事再重寫
你已下最後通牒 我躲在我的世界
你只是害怕一個人睡
我不想再為你掉淚
我了解 不會變 不再徘徊
開始自己的明天
愛到妥協 到頭來還是無解
綁著你 不讓你飛
歷史不斷重演
我好累
愛到妥協 也無法將故事再重寫
你已下最後通牒 我躲在我的世界
Monday, April 6, 2009
Travel Log: 2nd day in taipei
I was 10yrs old when I had first visited Taiwan. My memories of the country are frankly vague and distant. Apart from various scenes and scenery, I couldnt recall many of the things I had seen or done at that tender age.
20years on, it was refreshing to be back in a familiar city. Disregarding the traffic and the increasingly drabby city buildings, there are many things I like about Taiwan. The varity of food and fruits for starter scored major in my book. Generally, the people are warm hearted, friendly and always eager to help. I like the way they talk to you in a very much familiar tone such as addressing one's mother as if it's theirs. It simply strike me as a very heart warming effort on one's part.
The thing about travelling, I love making my way on foot or on public transport to get the experience. I found it really easy in Taipei due to the common language and th fact that it's easy to ask anyone on the streets. Even the bus drivers are so friendly. After asking him for directions, I could simply relax and chill in my seat till the driver announced the designated stop. Afriad that I didnt hear him, he would repeat the stop repeatedly till he was sure I heard him or when I learnt to reply in acknowledgement. Even before I alight, without asking, the drivers never fail to give me further directional instructions to ensure I could get to my final destination on foot safely. Maybe apart from Japan, such perpetual unsolicited thoughtfulness and friendliness in public service, is something that I have yet to experience in many other countries including my own.
This trip, we made it to Gu Gong Museum via the Metro and bus easily. Following which, we took another bus to Shilin Night Market. It was a super long day for my mum to walk the whole day non stop.
The night market was as usual bustling with crowds, noise and a spectacular experience popping in and out of countless stalls from one to another. The best experience was when from those mobile stall. Lined with 2 clothes racks and amidst the jostling crowd, I got to pick randomly any 3 top and bottom within 5 mins for NT500. It was all about scanning and grabbing speed before the store close the sale and move off to the next location. It was really fun!
So what is shopping without food? Unfortunately being in spring, mum didnt get to taste her Mango ice dessert. So we settled for soya bean curd and tang yuan. It was again a unique taste for soya bean to be mixed with an assortment of base such as red bean, red dates etc. It was delicious! The handmade tang yuan in giner base was even better!!!
I finally got a chance to try the handmade shanghai pan friend bao... I could only wish I had 4 tummies to fit everything in, not to mentionextra strength to carry everything we bought! Currently, the wave of korean fashion is sweeping through the Taipei market. Almost every alternate shop is selling Korean style fashion. Mum couldnt get much top as the sizes are all pretty slim fit, stopping at size 38 as the biggest in stock. I had a better chance in that department though I didnt pick up much since I have a penchant of "quality" attire over "cheap quantity".
The thing I love about Taipei Metro is how everyone naturally and instinctively avoided sitting on the dark blue priority seats, aka 博爱位 reserved for the old, pregnant and needy. Seats are lesser in the metro but despite the priority seat being empty, the youngsters and professionals choose to stand than grab the priority seat!! It was a value that I was very very amazed and impressed with. In fact on the bus, several times I had heard young girls wanting to give up their own (non priority) seat to senior citizens voluntarily. They didnt have to be asked, told or faking sleep. It was almost their 2nd nature. I really like that. My mum was abit shy to take the priority seat and I had to nudge her over convincing her that while she may look young, fact is she is old enough to qualify for the seat since she is over 60. After much prodding, mum finally relented but partially she was dead tired after walking over 10 hours with me.
At the metro station, I spotted their "give seat campaign". Rather than just a very factual request to give up your seat to those who need it more, they have various story posters. I saw a poster of a pregnant woman narrating about her anticiaption of the impending birth of her 2nd baby and how she is thankful for the public is always sharing their seat with her. The whole campaign was done in a very gratuitous way, as how we would often impart chinese values to the younger generation through chinese fables. It wasnt naggy nor imperative tone, it was just in a very causal human manner.
As for the station broadcast, it was done in 5 languages from mandarin, english to their dialects. In Hk, we have english, mandarin and cantonese. In Japan, major metro stations have english and Japanese. Yet, I couldnt understand why Singapore who claim to be multilingual, multi-ethnic society, would opt to deprive its commuters of all other languages except English. Is it that difficult to have the station broadcast clearly both in English, Mandarin? I find it hard to comprehend the rationale of doing away with the Mandarin. Have we forgotten our older generations so quickly that our grannies may not have understood the names of English station? Even tourists from asia countries would have found it helpful I am sure.
Anycase.....
The museum was a good trip learning about the old chinese treasures and culture. An ever enriching trip worthy of any visitors.
20years on, it was refreshing to be back in a familiar city. Disregarding the traffic and the increasingly drabby city buildings, there are many things I like about Taiwan. The varity of food and fruits for starter scored major in my book. Generally, the people are warm hearted, friendly and always eager to help. I like the way they talk to you in a very much familiar tone such as addressing one's mother as if it's theirs. It simply strike me as a very heart warming effort on one's part.
The thing about travelling, I love making my way on foot or on public transport to get the experience. I found it really easy in Taipei due to the common language and th fact that it's easy to ask anyone on the streets. Even the bus drivers are so friendly. After asking him for directions, I could simply relax and chill in my seat till the driver announced the designated stop. Afriad that I didnt hear him, he would repeat the stop repeatedly till he was sure I heard him or when I learnt to reply in acknowledgement. Even before I alight, without asking, the drivers never fail to give me further directional instructions to ensure I could get to my final destination on foot safely. Maybe apart from Japan, such perpetual unsolicited thoughtfulness and friendliness in public service, is something that I have yet to experience in many other countries including my own.
This trip, we made it to Gu Gong Museum via the Metro and bus easily. Following which, we took another bus to Shilin Night Market. It was a super long day for my mum to walk the whole day non stop.
The night market was as usual bustling with crowds, noise and a spectacular experience popping in and out of countless stalls from one to another. The best experience was when from those mobile stall. Lined with 2 clothes racks and amidst the jostling crowd, I got to pick randomly any 3 top and bottom within 5 mins for NT500. It was all about scanning and grabbing speed before the store close the sale and move off to the next location. It was really fun!
So what is shopping without food? Unfortunately being in spring, mum didnt get to taste her Mango ice dessert. So we settled for soya bean curd and tang yuan. It was again a unique taste for soya bean to be mixed with an assortment of base such as red bean, red dates etc. It was delicious! The handmade tang yuan in giner base was even better!!!
I finally got a chance to try the handmade shanghai pan friend bao... I could only wish I had 4 tummies to fit everything in, not to mentionextra strength to carry everything we bought! Currently, the wave of korean fashion is sweeping through the Taipei market. Almost every alternate shop is selling Korean style fashion. Mum couldnt get much top as the sizes are all pretty slim fit, stopping at size 38 as the biggest in stock. I had a better chance in that department though I didnt pick up much since I have a penchant of "quality" attire over "cheap quantity".The thing I love about Taipei Metro is how everyone naturally and instinctively avoided sitting on the dark blue priority seats, aka 博爱位 reserved for the old, pregnant and needy. Seats are lesser in the metro but despite the priority seat being empty, the youngsters and professionals choose to stand than grab the priority seat!! It was a value that I was very very amazed and impressed with. In fact on the bus, several times I had heard young girls wanting to give up their own (non priority) seat to senior citizens voluntarily. They didnt have to be asked, told or faking sleep. It was almost their 2nd nature. I really like that. My mum was abit shy to take the priority seat and I had to nudge her over convincing her that while she may look young, fact is she is old enough to qualify for the seat since she is over 60. After much prodding, mum finally relented but partially she was dead tired after walking over 10 hours with me.
At the metro station, I spotted their "give seat campaign". Rather than just a very factual request to give up your seat to those who need it more, they have various story posters. I saw a poster of a pregnant woman narrating about her anticiaption of the impending birth of her 2nd baby and how she is thankful for the public is always sharing their seat with her. The whole campaign was done in a very gratuitous way, as how we would often impart chinese values to the younger generation through chinese fables. It wasnt naggy nor imperative tone, it was just in a very causal human manner.
As for the station broadcast, it was done in 5 languages from mandarin, english to their dialects. In Hk, we have english, mandarin and cantonese. In Japan, major metro stations have english and Japanese. Yet, I couldnt understand why Singapore who claim to be multilingual, multi-ethnic society, would opt to deprive its commuters of all other languages except English. Is it that difficult to have the station broadcast clearly both in English, Mandarin? I find it hard to comprehend the rationale of doing away with the Mandarin. Have we forgotten our older generations so quickly that our grannies may not have understood the names of English station? Even tourists from asia countries would have found it helpful I am sure.
Anycase.....
The museum was a good trip learning about the old chinese treasures and culture. An ever enriching trip worthy of any visitors.
Friday, April 3, 2009
Landing at Taipei
I know if I dont blog this I will never get down to it...:)
Have finally landed on Taipei grounds yesterday after a year's departure. The weather is much much cooler than Hk, which is something that suprises me since I had assume their 22 degree to be as warm as HK. Luckily I threw in extra jumper at the last min but I had to buy stockings last min for my boots as the wind was really too cool towards eve.
Mum was really excited! Initially while planning the trip, she always had no opinion and whatever seemed to do. The min we arrives at Les Suite and I was discussing with the congiere on the plans, mum started chipping in and throwing in sights she wanted to see. However not knowin of all those places, I didnt allocate enough days in Taipei to see those things she mentioned. Sigh.....
Anyway, we headed to Long shan Shi temple. Architecturally, the temple's roof is a massive colour of dragons and phoenix. It looks pretty new to me even though the temple has supposedly hundred of years of history and the oldest temple in Taipei.
Have finally landed on Taipei grounds yesterday after a year's departure. The weather is much much cooler than Hk, which is something that suprises me since I had assume their 22 degree to be as warm as HK. Luckily I threw in extra jumper at the last min but I had to buy stockings last min for my boots as the wind was really too cool towards eve.
Mum was really excited! Initially while planning the trip, she always had no opinion and whatever seemed to do. The min we arrives at Les Suite and I was discussing with the congiere on the plans, mum started chipping in and throwing in sights she wanted to see. However not knowin of all those places, I didnt allocate enough days in Taipei to see those things she mentioned. Sigh.....
Anyway, we headed to Long shan Shi temple. Architecturally, the temple's roof is a massive colour of dragons and phoenix. It looks pretty new to me even though the temple has supposedly hundred of years of history and the oldest temple in Taipei.
As one enter the compound, you will be enveloped by the numerous devotees! It was an eye opener to see all the masses gathered together to chant the prayer (sound like a song), and kneeling and bowing. It was like those church mass but here, the atmosphere was natural, unpretentious and positively without those churchy instituitionalised regiment nor proceedings. I'm a person with faith without subscribing to a particular religion. While I would normally be turned off by religious gatherings, today, yet I was charmed by the group's melodious chant. A new experience. 
After that, brought mum to Beitou for hotspring. That really made her day. It was her first experience in hotspring and i threw in an aromatherapy massage to enhance the hot spring effect. Mum wasnt too use to massage so she squirm abit as she was ticklish. She was fearful it would hurt like those nasty ones she had in thailand BBK and I had to tell her that she can tell the therapist to adjust the strength if it was too much, and to STOP comparing with BKK session since this is completely different experience. I think she enjoyed it coz she looked more relaxed than I was! Ha!
It was really cold at Beitou at about 17degrees and since we bought so much snacks at Long shan temple area, it was too heavy to stop over at shilin night market. Today we shall head to the Gu Gong museum and then the night market! Shopping shall be tomorrow!
It was really cold at Beitou at about 17degrees and since we bought so much snacks at Long shan temple area, it was too heavy to stop over at shilin night market. Today we shall head to the Gu Gong museum and then the night market! Shopping shall be tomorrow!