My Journey. My Life

Its a morbid depressing month.
So many people have passed away.
Not people that I know directly but most are parents of friends and excolleagues.

What can u say to people who have lost their loved ones.
Nothing.
Nothing u say will make a shred of difference.
Nothing u say will make the person feel better

What do they need to hear
What do u need to say
Do they need solitude, or do they need support.
How do u know what they want

I am always at loss as to how to react, what to write in a card
Conscious of the sort of the deliberate expression to wear on my face
Its not that I dont care, I do
Its just that I dont know how to react to an intimate pain which is not mine.
I just feel everything I say or do are excessive and has no relevance.

Can I sympathise with the loss, yes.
Can I empathise with the pain, no.

I like neither chinese weddings nor funerals.
The extreme wave of emotions disrupts me, rankles me.
Overt display of joy riles me.
Overspill of sadness destablises me.
Anger rattles my cage
Does that makes me a weird person, a strange person, or a bad person.