Saturday, December 27, 2014

27 Dec 2014: Sometimes I wish my mum isnt so stubborn....

There really is no end to my mum's stubbornness.
It irritates u more when she refuse to recognise it.

For example she bought some Australian mango.
She bought 2 and they were half green. I told her she had bought really unripe ones and will take a long while like at least a week before she can eat them. She look at me and insisted that it's ripe because she can smell it. I told her "No mum. This Australian mango is not ready. If u slice it now it will be sour." She repeated "no! Who says mango must be yellow. U dunno in singapore those still green mango are ripe?"

I have to hold my rising blood pressure n repeated "these are Australian
Mango and I hand been eating them for last 10 years. The green mango u eat in singapore are Thai mango, I dunno how they are but I'm telling u this Australian mango needs to turn orange red before u can eat. I def know Australian mango better than u since it's native fruit for my man!!"

So mum left it in the fruit bowl as I told her. Two days later, the mango scent is stronger but still 1/3 green. Stubbornly my mum put the mango in the fridge n declare it's ready. I got really fed up n took the mango out. It's not cheap n I have no intention to waste my fruit just coz she's too stubborn to listen. I told her that fridge will halt the ripening n it's not ready. She keep insisting it smells ripe n that it will be soft n soggy. I refuse to comment further.

Finally 3 days more the fruit is almost all yellow n I stuck it in the fridge.

When we cut it, it was sweet ripe n firm. My mum was like all surprised. I told her "if u had cut it when it was green, I would have to thrown my whole mango away. And the fruit was firm n
Not soggy rite?". Only then was she convinced she's not always rite.

She finally bought another one and this time is almost orange red n I told her this can go to fridge earlier since it's almost ripe. She conceded finally that not all mango are to be eaten half green.

When she bought guava, again she insisted that hard guava is ready. I told my mum it needs to give a little when pressed before guava will be sweet.  Again she brushed me off saying guava is her specialty. Since guava isn't expensive, I let her go experience her theory.  I told her to skin the guava as the skin will cause constipation while the seed will provide the fiber for bowel movement. Again she didn't believe me. She insisted skin is good. I told her u can keep your skin but I will remove mine. After trying one guava with skin on, she experienced constipation n finally conceded again she was wrong.

After 4 guava, sour ones, she blamed the shop owner bluff her. She left one to sit in fruit bowl. I left it till it has some give when u press it. She insisted that guava is spoilt but it turned out fine and was finally sweet. Instead of admitting she was wrong, she now claimed it's overripe n too soft inside n she don't like it. sigh. luckily i liked it and ate it.

She also told me she like perssimon. I told her it belongs to "Han" (寒) category but she insisted it was warm. I had to dig out this fruits n health BOOK by Taiwan nutritionist and show it to her so she will stop doubting wat i said..

I'm just so tired of correcting all her wrong notions n she's so freaking stubborn that she must do things her way, proven wrong before she will listen to other people. It's like she just don't get it that we do grow up n learn things too.

More recently, I like my mum's steam pork egg dish. I told her that I like that for lunch every day. She said she cannot understand how it is possible to eat same thing. I told her it's fine, i like it and there are other dishes to provide variety. She keep asking if she takes out pork will be better. I told her no, I don't like steam egg alone it will taste weird.

One week later, despite me refusing her offer to steam egg alone, she had to cook the steam egg today without the pork or minimal. It tasted not very nice but since it's cooked I just ate it since I don't want to waste food n assumed we ran out of pork. However, when I opened the fridge, there is was, a 3/4 full raw minced pork. I asked her why didn't she used it today then? She said oh I plan to use it tomorrow but I said but it states expires today!!! Why would u keep it for after expiry date n waste perfectly expensive good Japanese pork when u could have used it today? I was annoyed coz I know she just want to cook the steamed egg because she thinks no one can eat same dish everyday, rather than wat I wanted. It's so frustrating coz now I have to put in freezer n eat expired pork. Jesus Christ.

Then when it comes to steam fish, she keep asking me how long to steam fish. Yet she keep splitting the fish in half and plate it like in aeroplane shape. I told her many times I don't want my fish opened up like that because u are causing the fish natural juices to seep out more but she stubbornly insist on doing her own way. Finally I told her "if I want to cook your own way, then I have no comments n don't ask me how long to cook because I dunno with ur cutting style.  U want to ask me to time it then u have to keep the fish intact the way I cook it. Finally one month, she finally does it the way I steam my fish before I will answer how long to steam the fish for.

The problem with mum is that she keep thinking she is very "liberal" and open minded but she really isnt. In her own world she thinks she is very receptive but to the real people around her, she is frustratingly stubborn and while she will pay u lip service that she may agree with u, she will still secretly do things her own way until she is proven wrong. Sigh.

I dunno if all mums are so difficult or just my mum so used to getting her own way.

Sometimes she is ok esp when its unknown terriority that she is unused to and she will be more open to listen to u, but sometimes she drives me up the wall when it comes to moments that she thinks she knows best. Even my husband commented one nite to me "You mum is really stubborn." I shrugged my shoulders. What can i Say?

Wednesday, December 24, 2014

24th Dec : Merry Xmas!

This year, my man decided to fix up the Xmas tree since we decided not to go back Oz. Yeah!!! Finally a year without having to see irritating people!!!

At the same time, my man whipped up my fav salt bush lamb rack with a whole lot of other goodies for me and mum. Life is good!

24th Dec 2014: Arrrrgghhh

Sometimes I don't understand my mum. She really don't listen to things I tell her when it's said nicely. She will always pushed to the point that I had to snap or raised my voice before she will stop doing things I tell her not to. Arrrggghhh.

For example I was prepping food by the sink. She kept rinsing the cloth and wiping the sink (not counter top but the damn sink) dry. I told her nicely "mum leave it first coz I will still be rinising other stuff n will get wet" she don't acknowledge. I went to cut my carrots n rinising my knife and she was at it again, I told her nicely "mum later. I will wipe down after I'm Done. ". She put her used cutlery in the sink and I was in the middle of washing the mug with water splashing and she went to wipe the sink again! I got really irritated and I have to raise my voice "MUM just STOP it. I TOLD u I will wipe it after I'm finished. Why are u wasting water n effort to wipe it dry and I'm in the middle of washing n the sink will be WET?!!!! " only then she stopped.

I don't get it.
It's not the first instance that she is so stubborn. It's so vexing to talk to her sometimes.

I appreciate many things she does but sometimes, I really wish she won't make me repeat 4-5 times n pissed off before she will stop. My MIL will always get it after I tell her things 1 time but my mum.... Sigh. And people always think I'm exaggerating when I say i get along better with my in laws than my own parents.

Tuesday, December 16, 2014

Dec 2014: a round up for the year

Finally managed to retrieve my password to blog again!!

Can't believe it's already Dec in a blink of an eye!!!
Most of my herbs have died from neglect except my rosemary.
Not to mention my ficus was invaded by swarm of caterpillars happily chewing their heart out demolishing the leaves by the minutes!!! Good thing my mum is here to help me rid the caterpillars!!

In the short span of 4-5 months, much has happened!

Not sure what's up with my bro and his useless wife but looks like it's heading for the inevitable separation path. Frankly, I have never gave this marriage a vote of confidence knowing her princess like behaviour which she prob will never admit to. We gave it 2 years but looks like it ended in less than 1.5yrs...

In that 1.5yrs, I had refused to call home because I don't want to hear mum
Bitch about her all the time. About her laziness, her empty promises, her major spendthrift ways, her alcoholic ways, her always coming home late after 2 am, her inability to do housework or even clean their own bedroom toilet, her constant "forgetfulness" to even take their own bed sheet to laundry for washing etc. OMG! I'm so sick of hearing all these things even before the wedding that I have enuff of hearing rubbish things about rubbish people that I had to cut the link to preserve my sanity. I can't stand constant hearing negative over a bitch that I have no interest in nor any desire to engage in any conversation that involves her. My policy towards people I dislike immensely is to treat them like complete stranger n not even think about them.

So imagine my non surprise when I receive a text  that proclaim about the big fight and the end of a mismatched marriage. I flew mum over so that she can detached herself from the situation n let my brother handle his own marital affairs, whichever way he wants.

My mum absolutely detest bitchface n was worried that my brother wants to take the bitch back.
After one week of listening to my mum floodgate of complaints over this bitch, I had about enough and had to tell my mum to stop by 3rd week. I had to put a ban on the topic and told my mum under no circumstances I want to hear bitch being mentioned in my household. She's a bloody jinx n I don't want her bad luck to contaminate my current happy home with all her negativity. Plus I told my mum, that her son is old enuff to make his own decision n we are in no position to influence his choice no matter how much we dislike or loathe the bitch. Marital matters are between the two of them n from the day he chose to marry her despite the whole family raising reasonable doubts & concerns, he has to bear the consequences of his choice. We can only sit by the sidelines, offer views only when asked n be supportive of his final decision or procrastination whichever it is. No matter how much we may dislike her, we are not the ones who have the final say. So no point bitching about something n someone u have no control over. Plus, I don't see why we need to waste so much energy n invest so much emotions over a dead weight fake bitch who will never change for the better? She will think she is always rite and be obnoxious about it, so wats the point?

Finally after 4 weeks, my mum realised I meant biz when I say "stop I don't want to hear abt wat bitchface did, didn't do or say. Not interested." I have to teach my mum how not to hold so
Much negativity in her life or she will never be happy. Then all she will ever  make a habit is constant bitching n complaining about other people which is NOT how I live my life. I think 2-3 weeks for her to rave and rant is more than enuff. I think she's getting it but it's been such a lifetime of habit I think will be hard for her to kick so long as she return back to Sg n get sucked right back into the environment. Oh well, I do wat I can. After all I'm prob the only one at home who can be firm with her without offending her majorly. My eldest bro will get backlash from her if he tries to do that & she will be extremely upset if her fav son does it to her & she will think her son is siding with the other woman.

Now, my mum is channeling her focus on my plants, cooking and playing farm heroes.
I'm quite impressed that she is almost at level 100! No small feat for someone over 65yr old. Quite proud of her. Now...if only I can work on her diet to make it healthier... She's eating too
Much snacks n sweets n greasy oily food. I had to put a stop to fried food because it's too oily. I don't know when her cooking become so unhealthy. Unfortunately for her, she will have to adopt my less salt, no sugar and minimal oil diet. I think she's suffering. Lol