Memory trigger

Was searching for something online and a familiar face pop up in one of the article.

Twice now I thought he was a dusty memories almost perished in existence but nope, once again, it is proven that my brain may be foggy about details but that call he put through donkey years ago left an indelible mark.

It's funny coz seeing face triggered a whole series of memories that has been tucked away in some compartment n I rem that call. That call that was too late. That call that he said he had loved me. Why m I still cringing I don't know.

Of course he's married now, I presumed so since it's an article about him n his partner setting a brand new business cafe concept in sg. I couldn't resist, being a woman or a bored mum curious for juicy gossip, to just want to know how does he look like now? Lol. Shallow I know... I know but hey, this is a guy who has once wore his heart on his sleeve n so I guess anyone in my shoes will want to see the Fave now.

Turns out he didn't change much. For a while he was chubby, not so nice.  Then he lost weight. Looks better. Hair still as funky lol. He seems happy with his two new love. He has always been a gentle guy so I think his new venture suits him. At least now I know where he works n I know exactly where to avoid bumping into him though I think he prob would hardly care.

I guess i kind of look back n second guess my decision in not telling him what he wanted to know back then n gave him a curt emotionless reply to get him moving along. I thought it was best for both of us. I think I did right but leaving an option as frens wasn't in my list then. It's thankful we don't have too many common frens.

End of memory trip

MIL in hospital.

My husband was telling me the other day, that his sister aka the fat bitch has not been going over to their mother's place for some time. Seemed like she was busy with something.

I had to bite my tongue to refrain from passing sarcastic remarks that now that their 2 spoilt brats are grown up and in school, and the fat lazy arse no longer requires their mum to feed and care for the kids, of course she has no more use for the old folks.  Moreover, I was secretly thinking to myself, everytime they MIA for a short while, some "bigger" request or events will bound to come later. However, owning to the fact that these are not my immediate family and she aint stepping on my tail this time, I didnt want to pass comments which may result in a super unhappy conversation on my end.

Just the other day, my mother in law called to ask for a CD compilation of all the photos I took for my father in law birthday. Previously I had asked her if she wanted a CD or developed prints. She told me prints and I had to Q and make 2 trips to get it done to send to her. Now suddenly out of the blue she wanted the CD. I know why she wanted it, its for those bitches off springs of hers that was too farking lazy to even bother to take photos for their Dad and now too farking embarrassed to ask me for a copy, which they know I would reject flat out to do anything for those lazy selfish arse. I wasnt too happy of course. I was thinking I should have farking deleted all the soft copies and be done with it. My husband commented that I looked as if I was going to murder someone. If muttering curses work, I would really enjoy Xmas.

Anycase, as to be expected of my premonition. My husband told me last nite that they he received an email that his mother had landed herself in hospital. MIND YOU, it was an EMAIL NOT A PHONE CALL. Apparently, the Fat bitch and partner took off to Sydney and left her two kids to my mother in law. She went to pick them up and stepped on a curb, slipped and fractured her ankle, leg whatever. She hobbled home and realised she couldnt move and had to be sent to hospital by ambulance.

So you see, EVERYTIME the FAT BITCH asked her mother for favors, I would be bleeding money on my end. Fat bitch takes off to have fun in the city for couple of days, land her mother in hospital and our side have to fork out money, nevermind the fact that their mother was looking after THEIR KIDS when the accident happened.

What is even more ridiculous? NO ONE, i mean NO ONE bothered to ring their brother about the incident until of course when its $$$ payment time and my mother in law moaning in pain in the public hospital, so they dropped an email, to causally mention the incident and about sending their mum to private hospital. Seriously, what kind of siblings are these? $$ Monsters from hell?

My husband of course complained to me, lamenting why his siblings couldnt even be bothered to call him, and that they are so CHEAP that they dont even want to pay that international call fee. He keep telling them it isnt very expensive. He was upset of course that no one told him about his mum.

I wanted sooooo much to pour oil into the fire about that fat bitch but decided that I really shouldnt since his mum is injured. So I told him "I told you before, your sisters are cheap and selfish. So what do you expect from them? It's not like this is the first time."

Funny how they know how to call asking for Xmas presents etc. But when it comes to family accidents, they didnt think it matters to ring their brother. Arrrrrgggghhhhh I just HATE them so much. How can such selfish people exist????

Well, I hate to say this, good thing I am not back in Australia and neither am I planning to head back this Xmas. I can only see these stupid people once a year and that is already asking alot from me.  I try to be sympathetic to my mother in law but as my friend puts it, their daughters can do no wrong so outsiders like me no matter how indignant or care for them, will never match up to the failings of those fat bitches, so no point getting myself overly involved. Just stay a cordial distance is better for my heart since I will bound to end up have a verbal fight if I continue to see the way they make use of their parents. Let my husband deal with it. It's his family.

Thank u to those that had once mattered, and still do.

Do u still hang out with people u used to date?

I do, though if things dont work out, I have to do the icy queen bitch thing for a year first and not do the "let's be friends" route till at least half a year of "cooling off" or "mourning" has passed. (sorrry!) If we survived after that interval, then yeah most times, things tend have a happier ending and work out better after the wound had healed. Sometimes questions still lingered in the air as to what had gone wrong but in life, we just move on and leave the past behind. 

In a not-so-recent rare dinner with a couple of friends brought together to share a meal thanks to "my return", my gf finally asked me a question she had been itching to ask for maybe say last 10 odd years when the guy stepped away. "Seriously you have to tell me. Did you two ever dated?" she begged for an answer.

To be honest, I was rather taken aback because I didnt see that coming and I didnt know how to reply her. People who are close to me will probably know I guard certain aspect of my relationship privacy rather fiercely like an air-tight container. I dont usually let on who I had dated or were dating saved for the inner circle. "Kiss and tell-it-to-all" is so low. So this question stumped me because I didnt know how honest I wanted to be with her and I didnt want to lie in case word get back to him creating misunderstanding. Yet I had to think of the implication of a flippant answer that may draw a wrong conclusion since his wife whom I knew, didnt know we had once dated. Damn these moments that sneak up on you.

Technically I really didnt enter a serious relationship with him. There was a spark but it was snuffed pretty quickly after a few dinner dates, mainly from a mis-sent sms. The bane of technology and a hand that pressed a wrong button....So there was a period of coldness, disdain and hurt primarily from his side and "apologetic-ness" on my part. I didnt want to rehash or describe the uncomplicated moment we had shared with a third party but I didnt want to pretend like our path never crossed either. I suppose my hesitation and contemplation on how best to respond to her was an answer enough and my gf went "I knew it! You two had something going on."

I didnt want to encourage her wild imagination so I had to tell her it was something a long time ago and we didnt really go very far, by that I meant emotionally. However I asked her why did she ask and she said "because I can tell that he is always extra nice to you even till now. He wouldnt make the extra effort if you aint here."Moreover, her line of question was also mooted by something I did unconsciously earlier. While sharing different meal set, I had offered a spoonful to him for tasting and he had just simply ate off my outreached spoon. Honestly, it didnt even occur to me that it should mean anything but my gf said he would normally just grab the spoon off the other party than be spoon fed. Oh ok...food for thought. I never read that much into simple acts as such especially since we are all settled down with our own partners happily. Do we need to draw such a distinct line amongst friends? Seriously, dont other people eat off a friend's outreached spoon? No? Really?? Thankfully his return to the dining table was her cue to stop badgering me and a topic left dead for good.

My gf's statement however did leave me pondering and reflecting on the guys I had been with. I must say most of the guys I had been on dates with are decent lovely blokes that will make any mother proud. Am I getting older and hence more sentimental? Come to think of it, would I have felt offended if he had taken the spoon from me instead? Hahaha. Maybe I should try this on different guy friends in future to weigh in on their responses for the sake of evaluation.

Jokes aside. The fact that I am still able to sit down together to share a meal with some of these chaps without awkwardness, share a joke like old time friends and leaving the "broken past" behind is something I truly appreciate and cherish. A few still take me out for meals whenever I can spare the time on my return trip and I hadnt even think twice about how fortunate I am to be this "pampered". Sometimes I may even have forgotten I had once dated them because over the years, our relationship had evolved to a comfortable friendship like a snug old T-shirt u want to curl up in. I suppose what my gf had said, about them still being that super duper nice to me really struck a chord and had me realised these guys I had dated really have one sweet common trait -a big care-bear heart.

My partner was sharing with me just last night about gals he had dated in the past due to some facebook updates. It was quite funny really hearing him describe the incidents he had with them though some he would shudder and say he rather Not spill the beans. Only spike my curiosity more...heee... I will worm it out from him one day...However unlike mine, he dint seem to share so much positive memories about this exs as I do about mine, maybe because he was more in a hurry to get rid of them or like I teased him, he was just a dating-whore! LOL!  

Life as I know it or sometimes... hear about it.

Time flies. 

End of August after my Jap paper was time again to make a quick escape back to Singapore. Primarily it was to escape the renovation noise from my neighbor, secondly was just to see my dog. Damn I miss that rascal too much, and I know he missed me too judging from the way he endlessly seek my attention, affection and presence.

It was a short trip of a week. Tried to squeeze as many people but as usual, didnt get to meet everyone I wanted to see but most of those I wanted did materialise. Caught up with some "new" people, by that I meant people I have not seen for a mighty over-a-decade interval in between. I almost couldnt recognise some. Pretty sure if I had bumped into her along the streets, I would not have called out to her coz I didnt know how much the years between us have changed her. 

For anyone, I tend to stay clear of certain topics I think its up to the person to bring up since I know how it feels like to have a meal with nosy people who loves to provoke me by asking stupid questions about kids and work. I only wish some people could have afforded me the same courtesy. As if I need to live my life to match anyone else's measuring yardstick or in accordance to "social norm". 

It wasnt on the way back when my other gf was giving me a lift back that I learnt that our common fren did get married but I suppose it wasnt a very happy marital life. I dont know if it has to do with inter-racial Indian-Chinese marriage thing or people just drift apart after awhile. Pretty sure it has nothing to do with the recent "Cook a pot of Curry" incident. heh. I didnt probe but I do pray they work it out somehow. 

This trip back, having chat with several people, I discovered that many friends of mine who married early in mid twenties do not seem to be very happy in their marriage. Maybe those who married later are still enjoying their "honeymoon years"or they already had enough fun and mentally ready to settle down.  Hearing so much of those unexpected stories have really immunised me from being surprised. My eyes dont even blink anymore when I hear anymore of those "straying" stories. Then again, I am pretty liberal so not many things will unfazed me.

I dont judge my friends, not because they are my friends or that what they do is really none of my biz, but rather perhaps with age, one learned that every man or woman has a reason for making their choices in life and we are in no position to maintain our moral high grounds and impose our values and beliefs on other people. It's not like we are still 16years old or even 26years still craving to have a wild time or fun or "searching for love".

While I am sure we have all at one point or another done some really crazy things in those moment we just wanted to feel free but as we get older, we know this isnt it. Being older over 30s, most of us will have common sense, we know the stakes and we know the consequences. So for someone to do or be tempted to do something "out of the extraordinary" that is probably "unforgivable" to many others esp over a period of time, there is always a root cause, a reason not for outsider to play judges.

So my role is to listen and be a neutral company. Sometimes I would ask more just for curiosity sake, sometimes for conversation sake, sometimes to allow the other person to unleash their inner thoughts and emotion struggles. One dont go around bragging or offhandedly tell someone else "Hey by the way I had an affair with someone else." It's not something one would say easily unless u think you can trust that person, not necessarily to sympathise but rather not to lay blame on you when the cat is out of the bag.

For some reason, I somehow earned myself the privilege to be a magnet for such confessions involving "Matters of the heart". Most of the time, I would eventually forget those stories not because I didnt care but rather I shouldnt hoard on to other people's stories. However some are truly too surprising to wipe clean especially pertaining to the people they cheat with. I had to go "Seriously?! Really?! HIM?!HER?!!" 

Some stories left me more pensive when one of them told me how her exposed affair nearly destroyed her career and her mental stability where she attempted to take her own life. Luckily she failed or I wont be able to have that drink with her. It was a good thing her husband loved her so much to take her back despite all the storm. Now the only thing that stopped her from ever repeating history was the fact she didnt want to inflict anymore pain on her partner. One thing she said stuck in my head, being that "Some of us out there neither loved our partner nor our lover, we just love ourselves the most." I still havent really fathom what she meant by that. If she only loved herself, then why did she fall apart from the betrayal of her lover? Perhaps there was something she didnt share with me. Looking at the beautiful woman laughing before me, no one will ever guess about the emotional scars that is hidden within her.   

Then another friend shared that she suspected her husband was cheating on her. Ok if he wasnt cheating on her, then someone need to explain to me why would he be partying every Fri, Sat and sometimes not even come home for a few days. Someone told her that there were twitter clues to his cheating with someone from his work but my gf seem to shut down and prefer to live in denial. When she told me her story, I didnt jump on the usual "divorce" him wagon. Instead, I asked her "What do you want? Do you still want to work on this marriage?" It's easy to feel hurt, get angry by betrayal but at the end of the day, one has to figure out if the marriage is worth saving. Sometimes, second chances work in life. That's what I learnt from all these martial affairs stories. 

Anycase, I didnt say much except the choice is in her hands. It's one thing to want to remain blind and married, but another to remain stupid and unprepared. She should investigate the truth of matters and armed herself with information rather than be a stupid sitting duck and go hysterical the day he choose to initiate a divorce and stand to lose everything. She told me his religion would forbid him to divorce her, I told her to wake up. His religion would have prevented him from cheating on her too if it had meant anything to him. 

So the week came and went. A myriad of stories. A friend first shared her joy of being preggy only to share few days later the devastating news of having to terminate the pregnancy due to complications. Another friend shared his woes about his recent divorce and child custody battle. I then have my own share of family drama with the loser leech that refused to exit gracefully. I suppose every family have our own unpleasant skeletons to deal with. I suppose this is life as I know it.

Another aggravating round with silly people

Winter in sydney now isnt really that cold. It's relatively mild compared to the last I rem when I was staying there.

Flew in on friday and had the new Cathay Biz class configuration seat. I definitely like the extra spare table spare by the side. Pretty handy for mac/ laptop users who needed that extra space. The seats are also wider compared to the previous configuration. Is this a sign that commuters are getting more horizontally challenged? Funny how that trend hasnt caught on to the economy seats width design...

Finally got dad's birthday party out of the way. As usual, the thing I hate about heading back to Oz isnt just the "inconvenient" opening hours of the place, but also some of the people I loathed to see but situation wont permit me to avoid them. It's better now since I have openly declared my dislike, I dun have to put up with the superficial fake cheek kissy thing with people I absolutely detest.

The thing about her is that she is stupid. Even when we visited the younger brother and his newborn, he complained to us about how "incredibly out there" their sister is. She wanted everyone to do things her way for her kids. People just had a 2month old baby and she wanted the parents to go play laser tagging with her and her son so that her son can have fun. But HARLOW STUPID, people are busy with new born. This world doesnt just revolve around you and your stupid family. So of coz her two brothers were shaking their head saying things about their sister only brothers are allowed to. For me, I just plugged my earpiece and ignored the rest of the conversation that involved her and more of her stupidity.

Even for dad's party, as usual, they dont pay up. As usual my husband had to front the A$3.5k bill when the rest obviously knew they had to pay but conveniently "forgotten" to pay the cash. That aside, the fat elephant who was supposed to be in charge of the 3 table seating turned up late. What's the point of spending stupid time and money on making place cards for seating when YOU ARE TURNING up LATER than the guest is beyond me. I almost felt like asking her "ARE YOU REALLY THAT DUMB?" Has all the fats from your belly gone up and wrapped themselves round your unused brain? Oh wait, do u even have one?

Plus the place cards were really unnecessary because they were all family frends and they all knew each other. They can sit anywhere they want and who they want to sit with. Christ, it took alot for me not to bang my head against the wall in exasperation. It's always very PAINFUL for me when I see Stupid people at work, making themselves look stupid with absolutely no help. My brain cannot digest incompetent people. It kills me. So I hate to plug my headset into my ear again and play my iphone game or slot money into the red packet as my mother in law tells me to. Otherwise, I cannot bear to look around me and these stupid people really drives me mad. How can they come from the same parents? My only conclusion is that this is what small backward oz town does to you. It defines you. It stagnate you. It lowers both your EQ and IQ simultaneously. I am so glad I am born in the city.

Anycase, I have no idea why she thinks everyone eats the same large amount as her. We were already full by halfway down the course. Yet she still had this HUGE cake waiting. I dun mind the cake, but I do wish she had more sense to book a smaller course and save us some money and not waste all the food! Then again, all she really cared about was to stuff her fat face with the lobster and abalone dish.

Then the other other stupid thing she did? We were suppose to have family pictures taken. Of course this fat woman didnt think to arrange anyone take picture. So I volunteer myself and my camera for my in laws to have a group photo taken with the guests are each table. When it comes to our turn, her fucking husband had disappeared. Apparently he had gone back to the car to sleep.

They BOTH knew we were going to take a family shot together. Yet they didnt think to tell people where his car was, or bring his mobile with him so that we can call him up. No, so the fat elephant expect my husband to miss part of the party to go to the carpark to look for her fucking husband. Is that brilliant or what?!! I mean this is the sort of self centered stupid people I am talking about here.

Of course when it was photo time and my mother in law was clucking away for everyone and ASKED my husband to get his sister's husband, my husband snapped and retorted he is not going running around to look for the other chap. I asked my husband to try to call him and the other sister's husband commented"Oh yes that would be a good idea." I was like thinking to myself "What? U mean none of you have the brains to think of that on your own? what kind of stupid gwei lo families am i related to?"

So in the end, we took the photos without the fellow snoozing in the car.

If that episode wasnt enough, we had lunch with mum and dad today and the fat elephant sister just turned up at our service apartment uninformed. Mum had given her the keys and so she made herself comfortable. FUCK. I HATE PEOPLE COMING TO MY PERSONAL SPACE UNINVITED. I dont fucking care if your mum is there, we are paying for it and not you. My husband was shocked and asked mum what the hell was fat face doing at the hotel. Mum said she was there to visit mum and dad. My husband then asked "But WHY is she there when she knew you are out with us here for lunch?!!!"
Mum kept quiet.

Then apparently, she got wind that we are having dinner with the brother and his partner with mum and dad, and so she just showed up and try to leech herself for a free dinner. My husband was initially pissed because he didnt want to PAY for them AGAIN. However, do we have a choice since mum was there and I think she wanted the family dinner. Sometimes I dont get mum. She is just being plain mum and honestly, I am glad she is NOT my mum. My mum is WAY cooler and more observant of situation and doesnt impose herself on other people. Even I wont impose on my brother or his family uninvited like that even if I dont see them once in a way. I mean, every family have their privacy and unless someone really invites you, you dont fucking get your face up to other's and expect to be welcomed. You dont take liberties with your silblings or take advantage of their kind nature. I can only say she is shameless.

So she is included in tonite;s dinner and my solution? I reject having dinner with her and so I had deliberately booked dinner at the SAME restaurant, with my galfren and arranged to be SEATED across  from them. It's my way of telling you "FUCK YOU. I rather NOT EAT with YOU fat face."

Luckily my husband is very understanding and his own sister gets on his nerves and so he is rather accommodating because he knows it is taking me alot not to snap at the bitch of his sister. I try not to push my luck but I told him it will be a very uncomfortable dinner if she is there and he understands since I am giving him the option out of a very awkward meal. Plus he knows my galfren and the fact we are in the same place also works well since he can come over and say hi anytime.

I honestly am past beyond caring what the bitch and family thinks. They will NEVER be MY family, at least not the stupid ones. There are some friends I consider more family than these people I am "binded" to by a piece of fucking wedding cert. It is almost distasteful to think I have to see them for several more years till both my in-laws pass away. *Shudders* U can say I cherry pick but at least the brother and his partner have more common sense and know the social niceties. They play nice, I play nice.

Of course my mother in law also rubbed me off the wrong way this trip with her stupid remarks about "Oh babies are so cute.. blah blah blah." and the fat elephant's partner asking when we are going to have any. With my mother in law, I just blatantly take out my iphone and headset and plug it into my ear. End of conversation. I dont want to fight with you but I hope you get the hint that you are being invasive and nosy and I DONT LIKE IT.

To other people, sometimes I really want to ask them "Are you really STUPID?" I mean if you see little kids, you see little kids. IF you dont, what is the fucking POINT of asking such a point blank question? Does it gives you thrill? What kind of answer do you expect? Imagine if someone else had miscarriage or are infertile (not us *touch wood*), how do you expect other people to respond to you with such insensitive questions? Does it please you to know other people's tragic tales or you feel that You must IMPOSE your fucking family views on other people? So i really dont get it.

I have NEVER felt obliged to ask any of my frens whether they are going to have kids. If they bring up the topic of wanting more, I say good and go ahead have more if your means allow it. If you are asking for opinion and constructive discussion, I will and am happy to discus with you the merits and cons of having kids. Then I may explain the choices of my life which is fine. But I dont enjoy people I dislike coming up to me asking me nosy personal questions like these.

Perhaps next time I should fake this really sob story of tragic take to make these nosey people Feeel bad for opening a can of worms and cry publicly to HUMILIATE and EMBARRASS them for a change and that might put a permanent stop to all these socially unacceptable questioning of personal life.

So there, now that I have got this off my chest which has been brewing since saturday, I positively feel much better. It's terribly to have all these frustrations built up in my chest. I really have to learn from my sister in law, her "zen" aspect to life in dealing with obnoxious people in her life if she has any. I need to cultivate her technique of "see no evil, hear no evil" skills and block everything out that nothing seem to faze her. She is positively a cooler chick than I am I think. I am too outspoken for my own good, esp times like these.

Sunday final catch up

The last Sunday in Singapore was spent with 2 other guy friends. Had to even out the gender ratio this trip back! lol.

Primarily had wanted to meet up with Stan since his recent relocation back from Sydney. He was my one and only fren back then and I was so lucky to have been able to spend the year with him there rather than lobo on my own.

Funny how life turns out. Stan and I went to the same college for first 3 months and we didnt reunite till a drinks session with a common fren after we graduated from uni.

While the common fren had drifted apart over the years, the both of us remained tight and updated with each other's life. In life, there are just some people you know whom will be your great bud for the longest time without any romantic inkling and Stan is just one of those few rare generous selfless souls!

Knowing how much I missed the raw nuts from Bondi Junction, he had specially lugged back at least 2 kg of nuts back for me! Touuuuuuccccched!

Since both of us already had our lunch, we dropped by Coffee Club for a decadent afternoon snackie, which translate into a pretty big slice of muddy mud pie. The drinks here have definitely taken a turn for the worse but the dessert was still decent.

We talked about the Political scene in Sg. I felt good ministers regardless of parties should be voted in. If people just vote randomly for the oppositions (esp the bad ones), then how different are we from PAP trying to usher their own people in via the GRC mechanism. The idea of elections is to vote credible people in. Putting good people in is important. I just had a feeling that some people have gone amok in their train of thoughts.

Anyway, as the tea time progressed, the topic moved on from our "civilian duties" to Stan and his impending wedding. I think I am such a good influence. Lol! 4 months ago when we had lunch, I talked him out of procrastinating in his proposal and had him scouting for a ring after our lunch.

As rightly predicted, I was told his gf was relieved and exclaimed its about time and she thought he would never ask! Haha!  I told him that I expect his wedding to be no later than Sep next year. He innocently asked me "Why not this year?" I stared into his eyes and asked "Do you even think its remotely possible judging by the current speed of things?!!!" He laughed his sheepish laughs.

In between the laughs and "evil" crackling, I asked him how he could stand me at times. His reply was 10% of  goofiness, 20% of vocalness, 30% of indignant, 40% of possible norm. That is what made me uniquely likeable and fun to be with. Awwwww...I was feeling all warm and fuzzy when I heard that:)

By 5pm, I had to split and head home. I think my dog is missing me to pieces.

I wasnt wrong. When I reached home, my lovable pup work himself up into a crazy bundle jumping all around my legs. I had to brush him off and trying to calm him down since I had enough scratches from his over excited pawing on my naked thighs. Even my brother's command to stop was no avail. This little fellow really misses me! The pup wont let up until I sat down, and he jumped straight into my lap and curl up like a baby, moving my hands with his paws to give him my loving scratches. It is such moments of attachment where I felt the dog is more like mine than my bro's! Lol! My mum poked her head out and exclaimed the dog was like a limp piece of vegetable when I wasnt at home and now he is bounds of energy. Both my brother and mum couldnt quite figure nor understand why the puppy is so smitten with me.

From the moment I was home, the pup refused to let me out of his sight. He rather stick around and guard me when I poo. Dont quite get why he rather smell my poo than play with his own toys. If I didnt know better, I think the pup worships the ground I walk! hahahaha!

Another year passed...

When one is having a ball, time seem to zoom pass at break neck speed. Before I knew it, my 3 weeks holiday in Singapore was over. Blink of an eye, I had to board the flight today and fly back home.

During the stay, some friends asked me if I missed Singpore. My honest answer simple. The country? No, not really dude. It's not the same country that I remembered. The friends and loved ones living here, well yes, damn much actually.

Each previous trip back to sg is always a mixture of joy, longing and at times a tinge of regret when I didnt get to meet up with all the beautiful people I had wanted to meet. Likewise, this trip was no different since my schedule was pretty much full and had instances of last min changes. So it was even more regrettable that I didnt see those frens that had returned shortly for Chinese New Year from abroad.

Yet, there were many highlights and happy memorable momens this trip back. Most of all, I have confirmed my hidden suspicions that I am a spectacular "Kinect and Wii" Retard.... I bombed sooo badly that I was pretty  much of an entertainment to my frens while having my first go at the games that I was surprised their neighbors didnt knock on our door for the screams and boisterious endless laughings. I thought Kinect was hard having to find your way with nothing but air, but Wii wasnt any easier! I was soooo bad that my fren said he never saw scenes in the games for Epic loser.... :) Thankfully, as we dragged more mums and dads into the game, I really didnt fare too badly though one of the daddy was marvellous! It was hilarious seeing the 2 very excited daughters cheering on separately for their own mummy and daddy! It was the absolute faith and belief that their parents are champions that is so endearing, esp from big cheeks who sees her daddy as her absolute idol!

Little Di Di was even more adorable, when he woke finally to see his daddy playing, he looked scared and whimpered everytime the on screen character fell off or got hit by the log. It was almost he thot his own daddy was in the TV. Such a cute boy and boy has he grown since our last gathering!!

Little Big Cheek is simply the most well behaved and adorable little gal. Amongst all my frens with kids, she is the singularly the only one that my partner and myself adored the most and missed. It probably had something to do with the fact she came and attended our wedding when she was just 5-6 months old and was a perfect angel without a single cry throughtout my big day! Plus it is equally endearing that she doesnt mind me carrying her and she is just so bright and cheery! Her mummy says she is a terror but in the short spate of few hours spent with her, she is Waaaaaaaaaaaaaay way more behaved compared to the tons of brats I have the ill luck of encountering in Singapore streets and dining spots. She gets excited but she doesnt screech or throw hissy fits! I simply love the way she look up to her daddy and proudly show me her accomplishment of writing her own name. I have to credit my gf and her hubby for being the kind of parents that raises great behaving kids! Then again, it is a relief that most of my gfs had such obedient genes in their kids.

As we rock the house down with our uncontrollable laughs, it was amazing to see my gf' 3 year old boy sleeping thru most of the whole din! He was soooo cute and his sleepin posture had me laughing the min I step into the house, being greeted by his fatty "pat pat":)

As I sat on the flight back and reflected on the week, the best part was catching up with people who are very dear to me, and bonding, making new memories that will last a lifetime. I shared a couple of drinks with E  and told her that life has been kind to me. I have a small handful of dear frens since Junior College but esp her, that I am thankful for in life.

As one gets older, and women who tends to form their own families and start to give less attention to their old friends, I am lucky that I have her in my life, and that our friendship has also strengthen over time for the similar beliefs, values, experiences in life we share. Life has taken us both for a long complicated ride but we both arrived at our own pace, to find our pocket of joy.

I stayed over at her place and as the 3 of us chilled out together including her hubby, we laughed about those days we used to live together from uni dorm to those days we started work, and how every little things like lights, furniture would remind us of the good old semi-single days. She was just telling me how she didnt want to throw away the broken lamp and the orange couch which was part of the whole memory.

As we stood at her backyard, looking across her neighbor's flat, we started laughing as we recalled the poor hen pecked husband living opposite who had to squat and wash his wife's panties and bra openly. It was a back yard where many heartaches, heart secrets, self doubts, confidences were spilled and taken away by the breeze that caress us nitely. It was a good spot to bring back memories of the good and sad times. My partner called me the next mornin and started laughing, asking what was I up so early at 9am. From our past historical track record, he had expected us to chat thru the nite till bright early morning. Both of us gals started to chuckle at the truth of my husband's words:)

All in all a super good trip and even a super good flight back. Cathay serves good choc cakes on their biz flight...but their laksa definitely need to improve :)

Kudos to Singapore food establishments that ban kids!

I dont care what the leaders of the state might say about being more "pro-family", I really dont relish a nice intimate dinner time with a bunch of ill-disciplined kids.

Some parents want to bitch about some food chain adopting such polices. Fine I get it, you feel discriminated against, but what about us who have to hunt high and low for a dining spot that can get away from kids? Just because you canx doesnt mean we have to share your plight too right?

I mean there must be hundreds of other eateries out there in Singapore that allow kids, so why must they be such insistent to assume that as parents, they have a free pass to go everywhere and anywhere with their children in tow. Just like you may like some time off from your kids (if u are a full time houseparent), so what is wrong with granting the rest of us a little breather and space? Granted that NOT all kids are bad, still, I have yet to witness a kid below 6year old that doesnt cry, whine, run around or scream at some point in time for an over hour long dinner.

Seriously, you are entitled to you chaotic all warm fuzzy children filled life, but so are we entitled to some peace and quiet. Afterall, part of my tax do go into subsidising your child tax deduction. So is it really that selfish for us to seek a quite spot without kids during meal time for those private dining moments?

I am not begrudging parents for wanting to spend more time with your kid at every available opportunity, but I do begrudge those parents who spend so much time with kids but FAIL to teach them manners esp in public places, and in turn becomes a liability and dread to others. So considering it  as such, why do you want to deprive us of a little request for "childless" space? Perhaps some parents are indignant about this post and feel that people like me are uncompassionate and selfish, however I can say the same about such parents by the same logic.

Having separate dining section? Have you realise how some kids are annoyingly loud or irritating just to get attention or trying to call the shots to hapless parents? I love those that gives a good smack to the hand but I really groan in dismay at those all cuddling "Oh My princess hush hush" parents, while the child was still screaming blue murder. . I wont be surprised if not because most parents are already immune to the loud boisterous noise. Immensed in the cloistered world of their own, most parents probably couldnt understand ( or choose not to, or too tired to) what ticks non parents off.

I would even gamely vote for one long haul flight/route without kids below 6years old. Wouldnt that be heavenly? No more crying babies to disturb those long overnight flight, no more irritating 5years kicking your seat from behind constantly (with parents ignoring that mischief). or children screaming for things..how heavenly would that be if we get our way!

I rem having to dine out with a good friend and she brought her 6yr son along. She belongs to the set of Bohemian "do not enforce rules" modern parenting and it was horrifying, not to mention embarrassing to have her son running amok almost colliding with the serving staff several times, yelling for attention, screaming blue murder over a wrong icecream, disturbing other tables by grabbing their food or playing with their ipad. It was painful to watch and I was not in a position to yank her son in place though I did hint to his dad "that not everyone likes kids interrupting their conversation no matter how cute the parents may think it is" His defense was "oh I will see the expression of other people to see if they mind." Obviously his observation power wasnt very good since he couldnt detect my disagreement with his child raising tactics.

Even if you are my friends, it doesnt mean I have to adore your kids. Sorry, I just dont like noisy kids. However if they can quietly sit in a corner and read their book, that sits fine with me.

So there, now that I have said my peace about children, let's applaud these dining establishment on banning kids altogther! Yipeeee! The next task in hand, to get SINGAPOREANS to DRESS APPROPRIATELY and NICELY for dining spots. Stop turning up in T-shirt and sandals thinking that is being smart causal. Go refresh yourself in dressing etiquette please.

Article source

1. Gunther’s Modern French Cuisine – 36 Purvis Street, #01-03, Tel: 63388955
This restaurant states in its website that it observes a “no children under the age of 7 policy at the restaurant.”

2. Kuriya Penthouse, 181 Orchard Rd, Orchard Central 12-02, Tel: 6509 4222
This Japanese restaurant do not accept child diners under 6 years old, except on Sundays and public holidays.

3. SANTI Restaurant, 10 Bayfront Avenue #L2-03, Casino Level 2, Marina Bay Sands Singapore, Tel: 6688 8501
The Spanish restaurant requests that guests do not bring children below 10 years old to the restaurant on its website.

4. Eight Cafe and Bar, 8 Bukit Pasoh Road, Tel: 6220 4513
The restaurant will be introducing the no-child policy at the end of this month. Its owner Bill Ho, 34, tells customers that the restaurant is not suitable for young children as it does not have chairs to seat babies. However, he does make exceptions for customers who arrive at his doorstep with children. For Mr. Ho, the new policy to bar children below 10 years of age is part of the outlet’s marketing strategy: ‘Most of our customers are young executives who do not want to be disrupted by crying children. It is a haven for young adults.’

5. University Club, at the National University of Singapore

Serving modern European and Asian fare, this eatery run by the owners of Prive Group, has adopted a no-child policy as well.

Afterthought after coming back from Singapore

I grew up in SIngapore, thinking that I was living in a perfect land with infrastructure and surroundings way more advance and better than any other Asia countries. This was especially reinforced when I went travelling with my parents to countries like China, or when I went visiting my cousins living in Malaysia. The "my country is really great" notion stayed with me till I was 15years old, that was when I had my first stint of ëxperiencing life out of Singapore with my homestay and exchange programe in Japan, Sapporo which started to introduce a better environment than what I had. I realised then that there are better countries out there, a more considerate societies that I had grew up in. Still, I didnt fully digest what I had been exposed to. I only know that there are countries better than mine.

As I matured and wisen up, and made more trips to other neighbouring countries, it broaden my horizons and open up my eyes and mind. I realised that pretty infrastructure is nothing more than a shallow surface, it is the society and people that matters more. Poorer countries may not booast of number one airports, ports or top countries to do business in, but they have beautiful sceneries to compensate for, their people are better natured, warmer, and less materialistic contrasting greatly to what many Singaporean has become and that is starting to chill my bones. So in short, my country may have richen in monetary value, but the soul of my nation has certainly gone poorer, under the pretext of "better life", with the constant chase of material wealth cheapening its core values.

Dismal aside about the pace of changing landscape, it's a little disconcerting about the attitudes and behaviour of the general youth today in Singapore. I went back recently on a short trip and open the papers, are expensive premium brands ads splashing all over the newspaper, or 24years old girl proudly decked in luxury foreign brandwears and bags, denouncing the long held concept and values of saving for rainy days, and her sole belief that money is for spending and she has no qualms about spending every penny on brands that I had not heard of or dream of splurging on. Her spendthrift values were further reinforced by parents who bought her Mercedes CLK sport car or whatever accorded names that are as alien to me as the complete range of botanical plants in the world.

There is really nothing wrong with indulging oneself if u are living within one's means. But call me conservative but earning a meagre SG$2400 does not support the "spend it all because it makes me happy' notion. Sadly, she is not alone. I am sure many of the youth today are shunning hard work, saving up for rainy days and only eager to shine in limelight without working hard for it.

I rem a story I read when I was a little girl. A story about the ant and a grasshopper. Where the grasshopper would mock the stupidity of the ant for working all day to store food and grain, instead of singing and dancing in the sun. Comes winter, the ant are warm and snug with plenty of food to last thru the cold, while the regretful grasshopper died alone with much remorse. I used to question the logic of the story, as to who will be THAT STUPID not to prepare for rainy days, to just see the good times and enjoy every moment with no thoughts of possible bad times? I think in modern days, this wise old story is coming back to haunt out current youth.

As I sat down for tea with one of my fren still living in Singapore, she confessed that Singapore is changing so much that even it is too fast for her that she find it hard to cope with all these changes. She misses the familiarity and some old spots that have been demolished, only to have another cold building in its place.

My friend drove me through town and I saw this school of art. Nobody seem to know what it is about, nobody cares, and what's more, the building is so non spectacular and I think it is really ugly. The architects has no concept of landscape harmony. Sitting down the road is SJI - converted museum, and further down Raffles hotel. Instead of retaining the colonial flavour that is a reminder of the historical value of the place, we have brainless architects that is slowly stripping the area of its beauty with a literal concrete jungle. By that, I meant a visually non appealing concrete building overflowing with hanging green plants to try to look wannabe-green building. I asked everyone in the car, which do they think look nicer? The ugly piece of shit SMU and school of art, or the former SJI boys school building and the Raffles hotel? The votes were no brainer. The colonial designed themes won hands down. Question is, who approved all these "modern" buildings smacked right in town, designs with no soul nor any linkage to the rich history of the area? Stupid stupid stupid. An opportunity to showcase any architectural talents is obviously lost on these people.

As I walked around local shops, eating at Joo Chiat local haunts, a feeling of resentment wells up as I am served by only China people. I stepped into 7-11, and 3 out of 3 staff are mainlanders working there. I went to Dempsey Long beach, and I was served by either only Mainlanders who barely could speak a word of English, or by Filippinos. The only local was the one collecting money. I went to coffeeshop in Changi village, I got another bunch of Mainlanders. I went to a Japanese restuarant and only 1 in 6 were was local, with 2 Japanese staff.  Japanese staff I can understand, but what happen to the other half? I went to Mandarin Gallery to Thai restaurant, I was served by a bunch of people who again didnt look or sound local. I hopped over to Jones the Grocer opposite, was served by 2 chinese guys with an American accent and mannerism (prob by products of international schools). So question is, what are happening to the local people? Dont they have to work anymore or everyone is too busy becoming their own bosses, or busy buying parangs to chop up one another?

 I went to the public toilets and I was disgusted. In East coast beach, the minute I opened the main toilet door, the smell hit me soooo bad that I backed away immediately. All thoughts of peeing vanished as the pungent smell assaulted my senses. How on earth can local people stand that? I havent smell a smelly toilet for years since I left Singapore. In Singapore malls like Takashimaya, the toilets still stink though not as much as that in east coast beach. There is a sickly smell masked by the disinfectant. In Hong Kong malls, I never ever had that problem. In HK, I never had to push open the door in fear of some disgusting toilet habits greeting me, nor have used sanitary pads discarded all over the place except inside the bin like people in singapore do. In Singapore, you never know what filth is lurking behind those doors. Its a utter disgrace and yet after 40over years, this awful toilet habits still have not improve one bit. Why?

When I was leaving Singapore to come back to Hong Kong, I decided to do a quick visit to the loo. Singaporeans after washing their hands, wet the sink area all over and fling the wet water from their hands all over without a second thought. Then I saw this little Japanese girl, maybe about 10-12yrs old. She washed her hand and dried her hands with tissue. She paused. I could sense her confusion. I didnt know what she was pondering on. Then she tip toed and grab a few more tissues, and she wiped the sink dry. When the local woman next to her wet the sink as she was drying the sink, the little girl just take more tissue to dry the sink area. Her mum, also a Japanese let her do it because it is a POLITE NATIONAL HABIT IN JAPAN that you clean up after yourself when u wet the damn toilet sink. The local cleaner didnt give a shit if the pads were spilling from the top of the bin to the ground, or that a tourist is drying up the sink for her. I felt embarrassed for my own country, that a Japanese little girl had to show us what is the correct behaviour even in a public toilet. And my god, this was in Changi airport.

Should it be sad that I felt more at home now in Hong Kong? That there are more things I like here especially in the service industry ? I no longer think very favorably of my own country. Not that I hate it, more it is more like a sign of frustration that we were once good but we lost that vision and now we are just mediocre, or worse, lagging behind in our social and basic etiquettes despite our annual bragging of GDP growth or toppin surveys rankings. What is the point of being number one in so many other things but we have forgotten how to behave as a civilised nation, that is if I can still call it my country and not an island known as China-town?

If going by Wikileaks published in Australia's SMH, with the leaks of some top officials thinking its great for SG to be assimilated by China,  and if that day do happens, if we do get assimilated, then I think that will be the day that I will finally stop holding my red passport with any last shred of loyalty and pride.

Another clash with hateful crass China tourists and why I hate them

While composing this post, I didnt know if I should be filled with rage or remained bemused by the whole ugly incident with this China couple. I would put it out there, I HATE, LOATHE china tourists in general, especially those sick bastards who made it rich in recent years and couldnt wait to flaunt their wealth in the most disrespectful manner. So this incident only further intensify my rage against these human parasites.

The incident goes like this. We headed out to HK DFS in TST to check out some sales. While we were in Bally store, the place was full of people and only had one staff trying to sort out some mistaken payment by one group of china tourists. We waited and waited for a good 3-5mins. Seeing there was 2 empty seats, I sat down and wait while playing with my iphone games. Naturally when I sat down, I choose to sit extreme right near the seat edge so that it gives more space to people who waited to sit on my left.

Within 5mins I had sat down, this rude fat china prick just plonked his fat arse down unceremoniously from my right side and literally pushed me off my seat. Not wanting to argue with an uncouth man, I just move slightly to my left and continue to play my game.

In another couple of mins, he shoved me again. I turned to look at him. Note, LOOK not glare, to see what was his problem. He demanded loudly to me in Mandarin "Move Over!"

I was already annoyed that he had shoved me the first time and now you are ORDERING me to move FOR YOU? Fuck off you china freak. So I calmly and asked him point black '"Why can't you move yourself?" I think its a valid question since I was seated there first and if he spotted the empty seat, why couldnt he just walk over like any other decent human beings would? I would have moved if he was polite, and didnt shoved me the first time but No instead, this wanker think that he is still in China and because he have some stinking Money, he can bully people around.

The fat twat obviously was stunned at my counter question to ask him why couldnt he move himself and he flew into a stinking rage. He and his china slutty partner decided to yell at me in Mandarin saying "You have no manners, never seen the world, country pumpkin etc." All these simply because I refuse to do his bidding.

Like all uneducated, barbaric China people, he couldnt be reasoned when I politely explained that he had already bumped me once without apology, and I see no point in having to move again. Of course, like all Lying Despicable China Freaks, they yelled at me and they refused to admit their mistakes. My husband not understanding mandarin, saw the commotion asked what the hell was happening and told the china clown to get his fingers off my face and stop being so rude. Instead, they continue to point at me in my face with their fat stubs, like 2mm from my face, cursing at me. The china prick thought my husband was saying I was rude, went in stammering English "Yes, RUDE, YOU Rude! No manners!"

I laughed. Yes I laughed in the fat pig's face and commented in a snide manner "He is refering to you dude." It took him like a full min before he even understood what I said. Then he went ballistic. The couple started to yell at me in all sort of curse words, saying I was ill mannered, I had no class, I was ill bred, uneducated, no social graces etc. All this time, the two clowns were yelling at me, shocking all the customers and sales, while I was sitting there calmly not reacting.

Like all TYPICAL CHINA BULLIES, they tried to intimidate me and wanted to cower me into submission by employing the China Village bullying tactics by numbers. He went to complain to all the other china tourists about me, saying that he asked me to move and I asked him why I should move. The pig couldnt even get it right, my question was WHY COULDNT HE MOVE? Plus the slutty woman added how was she to know that I dont know Mandarin. HELLO, WE ARE NOT IN CHINA. WE ARE NOT OBLIGATED TO UNDERSTAND MANDARIN ESPECIALLY WHEN WE ARE OVERSEAS IN A TOURISTS SPOT. Plus obviously I understood you which Is why I asked you why couldnt you move yourself. How stupid is she? Plus the fat gut wasnt handicapped though I wish I could make him one, and he wasnt old, and most of all, I was seated there first and he shoved me! It was a legitimate question but of course, you cannot reason sense with uncouth China clowns.

No one jumped on the wagon of course. My husband couldnt understand anything the china guy was cursing at me, but he definitely pissed off the China prick further by mocking his finger pointing actions. The China coupple with limited English vocab, could only scream at me "You fuckers, you Son of the bitch, You bastards. Shut up shut up!" Shut up? I didnt say a thing. I really had to chuckle.

I mocked at them with a smile and said, "Whatever dude."And also in Mandarin so that they can fully understand my insult, "Yeah people like you sure is showing a lot of class. So this is your CHINA CLASS. Is this what your country teach you? Do you think you cursing vulgarities is your having seen the world? WOW! Impressive, funny." It drove them further into rage.

The fat bastards of course pointed at me and tried to intimidate me by saying in mandarin 'You are ugly! You are the ugliest woman I have ever seen! U are so ugly!" I laughed even harder. Here is a FAT Ugly Pig Face China man with a Pot Belly, telling me I am ugly. How convincing is that? Plus why should I care when I know I am not ugly? Haaa haaa. So I laughed at replied him in Mandarin mockingly "Nevermind I am ugly, I am not going for beauty pageant so its ok. But you on the otherhand, totally without looks, uncouth and no class, you are totally hopeless."


By now the securities are all into the store in full force. They china guy know that he couldnt piss me off by insulting me deciding to employ the country pumpkin uneducated curse, he started swearing in the worst Cantonese curse, saying our mothers are cunts, are whores etc, go Pok Gai etc. If my husband could understand, the fat china wanker would have been down unconscious in a flash. So I didnt translate to my husband and just turn to the security, are u going to continue to let him go on like this? U know exactly what it means. The security was telling me to forget it but holding back the fat wanker who wanted to bash me.

Seeing that I still have no major reaction or anger towards his curses, then out come the typical CHINA MAFIA tactic. The THREATS. He started to scream, really SCREAMED "You watch out! You better watch out! I will cut you up! I know people and they will wait for you to butcher you! You come China you better be careful!" I rolled my eyes at him and laughed (esp the thought that like he is going to sit at the immigration everyday for me) and mockingly replied him "Watever dude. I couldnt care less what you say." I muttered to myself in Mandarin loud enough for him to hear, that why would any human be upset with a mad dog that that barking crazily? We are not even of the same league.

I could have said a thousand things more to push his buttons and remain calm. I could have sang ï'm beautiful I'm beautiful"by James Blunt in his face and laugh. I could have told him "he is Human waste (ren zai)" I could have told him an infamous chinese saying, elephant trunk will never sprout from a dog's mouth. But I didnt insult him because I didnt feel like he would even understand sacarsm, plus my husband with black belt will really bash him if the fat prick lay a finger on me, and I didnt want to blow up the matter since we are working here and the jack arse is just a tourist here. We have more to lose than he does. It is funny to mock him and send him into rage, but its not funny when it comes to blows.
With such crass people, it will only be a lose lose situation. They have no reputation, they have no dignity, they have no class except a big fat elephant size EGO and flase sense of INFLATED SELF worth. They know people look down on China people for their bad behaviour so they try to overcompensated by decking themselves in luxury brands to try to BUY respect. But CHINA freaks like these do not deserve respect nor backing down. They need to be taught that just because they shop in expensive stores doesnt mean they can bully people around.

In the end, the security guards initally asked me if I want to step away to calm the clown who was to burst but I flatout said No. By leaving, it means I am at fault which I am not. So I calmly sat there while I told my partner to continue to try his shoe. The china obnoxious duo also tried to sit down and shop but because they are not civilised people, they cannot do it. They huff and puff and said I am ruining their day and left immediately.

Oh goodie! So I did RUIN their fucking day without even having to say one swear word, and still managed to carry myself with dignity and smile. Was it tough? It wasnt easy not to yell back but normally under extreme stress and dealing with CHINA people I despise, I always end up devoid of emotions esp when I stop caring. I am pretty good at being cold to people I dont give a shit about from years of practice.

When they left, the HK sales woman quickly offered me and my partner some water to calm down. The floor manager also come to us to apologise, and gave us a box of Bally Chocolates to take our mind off the incident. The floor manager told me that even though he wasnt there, he is very sure it wasnt my fault either and they are very used to such crass rude and insulting behaviours from these CHINA losers.

During dinner, I finally translated what was cursed at us. My husband initially was upset that the fat china freak called me ugly and was sorry he didnt understand or he would bash the guy. I told him its ok because I really wasnt offended and I just shrugged it off. Rather, it didnt even register any impact except it was funny coming from him. I never profess to be pretty, nor is my job a model, so what if I am not pretty, there is no crime in that. Only shallow china people like them who only cares about outward appearance more than internal beauty will be offended by slurs like this. When my partner learned by the china guy cursing his mother being a cunt, he was really angry and vowed tat he should really learn his mandarin and cantonese better. I told him rather, I am glad he doesnt understand so that our laughing was more effective in driving the fat wanker nuts.

Of course I posted the incident on facebook and got many responses to it. All on my side of course. Some found it funny at my responses and people who know me well wasnt at all surprised at the non reactive way I handled the arsehole and cheered me on. My friends said of course if we were Caucasians, they would never even dare to raise their voice at us in the first place.

These China rude people are like dogs, and should be treated like one. China people have never been persecuted like the Jews in the hands of crazy people like Hilter for sole reason he didnt like the race. If China had suffered like the jews did, they would perhaps learn what is respect and love for others. Sadly the history of wars and communism have taught a handful of modern citizen of China people who have not stepped out of their shallow well nothing except poverty, loss of civilised culture and the insane greed for money to better their current lives. All they think about is that they have been under dogs for so long now, and TOO PROUD to act decently. They would the world to recognise them without realising that respect needs to be earned, not demanded.

There should be zero tolerance to bad behavior in Asia, esp with the influx of rude china people invading our lands.

I have read many complaints about rude Singaporeans by Australians and others, those are nothing compared to the true extreme shameless rudeness displayed by many China tourists, who are master of rudeness. I wouldnt be so callous to say all china people behave like this but many are driven by the intense need to be boot licked and crave for status recognition.

It's a good thing that my partner earned enough to support my boycotting China made products as much as possible at home, anywhere else but china maybe except maybe clothes since I dont give a shit if the china people want to torture their own people to death through sweatshop labor. I do not see how my perception of China people will ever improve if I meet are crass people like these.

The last parting thoughts, it is funny that China people who are not educated overseas, seemed to only know 3 swear words, You fucker, You SOB, You bastards. Its funny. Perhaps one of this days, I should educate these China imbeciles that there is a broader swearing words like you m*therf**king dipsh*t, pu*s sucker fkhead, fat twat retard,lame piece of nimcompoop China jackass. Then again, do I want to waste my breath on these losers? Prob not, it was just much easier to point and laugh at them, as they make a terrible fool out of themselves with their one man swearing show as they turn purple and ready to pop!

Luckily for me, there is no love lost there. However the dread that these crude people are invading my country and flood my land with their crass off-springs (since what kind of parents will raise the same kind of child) is a terrible thought and leaves a bitter taste in my mouth.

How many of us like SG thesedays?

"I dunno what I am defending anymore" Talk about hitting bull's eye! Many of us hardly feel like we miss Singapore nowadays when we leave, apart from the fact that our families are still rooted there.

And as usual, the SM husband and wife tag team are absolutely clueless about the realities of Singapore. Previously the wife was backing up the wrong team of a NKF cheater offending us with her gallant defence that the CEO skyrocketed pay was "peanut pay", and now the SM husband is asking incredulously as if it true that many of us are getting disillusioned at what Singapore population has become. Why am I NOT surprise at his reaction? Isnt this the same fellow who offended the whole country with the infamous "Quitter" Speech, and yet fail to examine how many ministers' children failed to return to SG and live? He had soooo totally lost my respect ever since that episode, and much prefer if he voluntarily step down from his post if he is losing touch with the ground - the LOCALS and I can never stand those moments where his foot always end up in his mouth..I wish Tony Tan was the PM and SM instead..at least I much prefer to hear him talk sense.

Back to topic at hand. Everywhere I turned, it's almost foreigners (PRC) left right and center, taking up jobs that used to be taken up by a local, or by our neighborly cousins Malaysians. It's so annoying that I cannot even seem to call this country my home anymore but rather "extended china" because the landscape has changed so much that I failed to recognise it as what it use to represent. Seriously, everytime when I get back and chitchat with my friends, most of us grumble about the workforce and the increasingly non integrative population....it is sooo distinct nowsdays...and sad too.

Like the uni undergrad chap, most of us used to feel very strongly and proud about being Singaporean, despite the fact we might cringed a lilttle at the "Stand up for Singapore" national songs...yet now....what does Singapore means to me? A place where my families and friends are. Period. Attachment? What attachment? What do I have to miss when every corner I turn, it's another accented Mandarin tongue who brings their habits over?

No I dont disagree with the policy of influx of foreigners since let's face it, every country has it fair share of foreigners and immigrants, but please pray, do define talent to what extent do we let the size grow? 1:3 ratio is scary. How is PRC serving as retail staff, PRC serving at cafes, PRC serving at restaurants, PRC working in a low level IT job, etc etc be all considered "Foreign Talent". Many of them are here on the pretext of study visa, overheard in some cases, and some having spoken to them personally. Why are they allowed to work a perm job if they are on study visa? Others, too old to be on study visa, I dont even know on what grounds do they enter the country to be hired in the low level blue collar jobs? Well hookers are prob the only ones we all know came in on social visa.

That's said, it isnt all the PRC that are bad. Some of the Caucasians are here for the ride too. Some of them are employed here as directors and top managements, only to have them squeeze out all the locals in the whole institution because they didnt want to work with the "local people." What is more mortifying? I have heard first hand accounts that some of these so called top talents are actually Nobodies in their own European countries, doing some gigs and stuff but they got creative with their resume and the fact that its just too hard to verify every one's resume from overseas, we ended up with a lot of big shots of no substance. Simply because some locals still have discriminating inferior complex, with the "White is good, Yellow is lousy" colonial syndrome.

I rem my European fren who turned PR sharing a personal incident. He couldnt understand why some institution are blatantly obsessed with hiring blonds and blye eyes, while  turning a blind eye to the discrimination of the locals. When he discovered all the senior positions were held by foreigners, he questioned the rationale. He was told "these are the best talents invited to hold the positions here." Unconvinced, my fren did a little digging and discovered to his horror some of them hold fake credentials from little known or non existence uni degree. He reported them to MOM and he was asked " So what do u want us to do? Do u want us to deport him?" When his deed was brought to open, my fren was being ostractised by the FTs, questioning his motives, asking him outright "WHy are you siding with THEM when u should be one of us?" THEM - The very country who offered these FTs a cushy job, fat checks and us being treated like a fool.

Building HDB SM? Well, we are not begrudging the hard labour force now are we? You missed the whole entire point. The idea of importing foreign labour is not wrong. We always had foreigners working in our country since as far dated back in the 80s i can rem. However the point is that, the locals did not feel and were not  feeling immediately threatened and OVERWHELMED by the existence of of the non locals. Which is why we could work hand in hand and still feel a sense of attachment. Now, we have a bunch of people who do not seem to want to integrate into our culture, but only here to milk the system, enjoy the convenience of the passport travel, the stability and schools for their kids...and then what else? Comes to the crunch, their ROOTS will be where THEY ARE FROM where their parents, grand parents are, not here with us. Even with many foreign born and bred partners, the national alliances will always be divergent. The foreign partners will will lie with their home countries eg: France, U.S, Australia etc.They might be PR but so what? This isnt the land they grew up in and has any fond childhood memories, and their families are not here, so why again will any of them fight any war for us when their own country might need them one day? So imagine if those PRs who are not binded to any locals, why would their alliance be with Singapore? Just because the Govt gave them a red passport? What a joke right?

My uni friends and I shared a story the other day over dinner. One of our girlfren working in sg had a appointment with a "impt, big Overseas client" that the company values very much. As she took a deep breath and open the meeting room door, there and behold, the so call "overseas talent" for the joint project was none other than our college mate, a born and bred Singaporean who just happen to be working overseas for couple of years. We laughed at the irony at how when we worked in Singapore straight out of uni, we are treated like dirt like any other locals. Leave Sg, work overseas for a few years and you are treated like a Golden boy or Girl (Foreign Talent). Perhaps, all the SG local talents should ALL leave Sg and leave the country for the foreigners and have our govt beg us back to appreciate what they have lost.

source : http://sg.yfittopostblog.com/2010/10/30/i-dont-know-what-im-defending-anymore/

Young Singaporeans like Lim Zi Rui are becoming increasingly disillusioned and they’re not afraid to let it show.The 23-year-old final-year aerospace engineering student was among a 1,000-strong crowd who attended a Ministerial Forum organised on Friday by Nanyang Technological University (NTU) Students’ Union. Senior Minister Goh Chok Tong was the guest-of-honour.

During a dialogue session after SM Goh’s main address, Lim stood up and asked if the Minister was aware that many young people no longer felt a sense of ownership in Singapore.

“When I was younger, I was very proud of being a Singaporean,” said Lim as reported in The Straits Times.


“But that was about five, ten years ago. Five years later, with all the changes in policies and the influx of foreign talent, I really don’t know what I’m defending any more.”


He said this was a view that many of the men he served with during National Service also held.

“I feel that there is a dilution of the Singapore spirit in youth… We don’t really feel comfortable in our country any more,” he said.


Mr Goh replied, “‘This is one early sign of danger… If this is happening, it is very serious.” He went on to ask Mr Lim why he felt disconnected.

Mr Lim told SM Goh, ”‘I’m still serving as an officer and I definitely would love to defend Singapore.”

But he said the key difference between him and his foreign friends was, “I tell them, this is my country. I can’t just leave here whenever I want to. You can come and play and work here, but I have to stay here.”


SM Goh responded by defending the government’s policy of welcoming foreigners.

“You want to have a home. Who’s going to build your HDB flat?” said the Minister.

Lim replied that due to the inability to afford the sky-high public housing prices, his brother had to call off his engagement.


“My brother got engaged, but lost his engagement because he could not afford an HDB flat,” said Lim, who went on to state that his question was not about “integrating foreigners”.

“My question was, how are we going to help the younger generation feel a sense of belonging to Singapore? I don’t think it’s about integrating foreigners,” said Lim.

“This is your country,” SM Goh replied. “What do you want me to do to make you feel you belong?”

“For my part, don’t worry about me,” Mr Lim said. “I will definitely do something, if I can, for Singapore. But I can tell you honestly that the sentiment on the ground is a bit different.”

“If this is happening, it is very serious,” said SM Goh.

“If the majority feel they don’t belong here, then we have a fundamental problem. Then I would ask myself: What am I doing here? Why should I be working for people who don’t feel they belong over here?” asked SM Goh.

Earlier on during the dialogue session, the Minister made the point that the next General Elections, due to be held by February 2012, would be a “watershed” for the future of Singapore from which a “fourth Prime Minister and a core team of younger ministers will emerge”.

SM Goh also challenged the young undergrads in his audience to “make a difference to Singapore” by joining local politics

Walking down childhood memory...

A nostalgic trip back home. I spent some time packing to throw away old work notes and books, and came across my photo album:) I dun have many photos when I was a kid..it was fun looking back!

This's not my granny. I never had any pictures with my granny. This granny is my neighbor in our old estate and apparently, the whole family dotes on me when I was a little girl. My brothers and mum used to complain how I would always duck out of the house and go over to their place to play, and have my meals there.... as they are cantonese family, which is why my mum lamented I am destined to marry someone of Cantonese descent...It's a pity I cannot rem any of them since we moved house after I was 5yrs....

The daughter of granny. Incidentally, mum said I love apples on my clothes when I was young. She said I use to pester her to make clothes with apples badges to be sewn on it. Mum chuckled and said I was picky too! I didnt accept all apples! I reject apples with cartoon worms. It has to be a perfect apple, or a bitten apple without worms! Ironically, I had to avoid eating apple for a while because concentrated apple juice was too sweet for me and I was allergic to it...

 

This shot was taken after I won some "cute kid" contest that my neighbor secretly took me to participate in. Mum said she was totally unaware until my neighbors came rushing up to our flat, asking mum to collect the prize since it has to be the parent. Mum said she never knew what I was "up to" since a lil girl...lol

ne of my best friend after I moved to my new place. I dun rem her but I rem the slide playground I use to sneak out to every day....Mum said I went "crazy" one day and took the scissors and cut my own hair off. She didnt know to be mad at me, or to be sad for my hair...

I only rem taking this shot after we came back from Botonical Garden. And the next day after this shot, my cousin got a slap from her mum because she was indignant that the hawker center drink stall owner had given me an extra lychee in my drink and she was screaming bloody murder at the injustice! Luckily america wasnt so big into non physical upbringing then or my aunt would have been in serious trouble for slapping her in public...

 Spending time with my fav Malaysian cousin! We use to share everything, play together, until my aunt passed away when we were 10yr and they couldnt come over to sg anymore... We are still close since they are the closest silbings I could get near my age. Of course the fact that they are in Malaysia means we hardly get to meet up but at least when we do, time and distance doesnt put a dent to the relationship:)

It's very strange how I can forget many things and yet rem things like this blue stool chair and the pink doll.

Wrapping up Singapore trip

Been to Singapore and back.

Somewhere along the way, I had somehow chipped my lower tooth even even realising it! It was until I got back and was flossing that I noticed the chip! Crap! Because its always "hidden" behind my buck teeth, so its not obvious...still its a sign of worry. The last I checked, the dentist said they were in good condition. I didnt bite on any hard stuff....so I couldnt understand how it happened!

Anyway, My bro drove me to Sim Lim and got myself a cisco router to finally fix up my wireless at home. Finally my iphone is no longer rendered useless at home! haaa haaa

Went to amazon and bought a Kindle DX for my partner since he had been eyeing on it for some time now. The advantage is that we no longer had to wait for paper back to be brought into HK and it will be cheaper than books to buy the titles!

It was a good week spent in Singapore. Met up with some college friends on Thurs nite at one of the girl's place. Didnt realise how close she lived near me. And my god, the guys really stuff me silly with all the local food! They went out to buy loads and loads of food from satay, fried O-Jian, fried rice, fried squid, grilled chicken wingg, BBQ sting ray etc....Just when I manage to polish most of it off, the guys from 2nd round joining us brought even more food! I nearly died from thinking of food alone!!!! The only thing they forgot was my sugar cane juice....sigh...but i had warm coke to stand in...In between food, we were completely wrapped up with the Xbox F1 game they had installed at home, complete with the seat and car-like gear accessories! Needless to say, its a good thing I wasnt a competitive driver....

We hung around close to 12am. Some had to head back to work, some went to bed, and another ended up chatting with me till 5.30am in the morn. Typical of Singapore, it would be impossible to be hanging out at void decks without being attacked by mosquitoes....


These are friends for 18yrs now and as we sat there reminiscing about the past, we laughed about the petty fights, the stupid jokes, and all the nitty gritties we did back in those days. The present isnt pretty for some, work, personal whatever. Some had to go through ugly divorces, painful child custody, some had to rough it out at their jobs but some had it good too. Life is truly unpredictable.

In between the busy schedule, manage to sneak some time out to meet E and her hubby. They took a cab down to the cafe near my place and we hung out for hours and we all got bitten really badly in the alfresco spot. In total, I had 8 nasty bites in 3 hours and they swell up like crazy and even their cig smoke couldnt drive the attacking bastards away. My gf and I commented that its strange how we never ran out of things to say no matter how frequent we meet or how many hours we spend talking and talking...I guess when u have been friends that long, you have alot of materials to work on from past to present....

My gf asked me if we might be the only people where she calls her best friend as her hubby's other honey?  I started to laugh everytime we think about this... and I told her its only possble because we completely trust each other, plus beings friends first before they got hitched defintely helped. Its amazing that the 3 of us simply doesnt have any secrets between the 3 of us, and i meant from personal to family matters. Its not always you get to have someone who listens supportively and doesnt use what you shared as gossip material with others.

As one gets older, one cannot help but be quite thankful really, how we have gone through several rough patch to reach where we are, but all the misunderstandings seem to secure our friendship further. It doesnt happen with every friend I have, some drift apart, some are too consumed with their own lifes to care about others, but I'm glad at least there are still some I know I can solidly count on at any time, and not at their convenience or whether it was a good day.

My bro loaned me his iPad and my god, I was so addicted to the Zombie and Plants game that I stayed up most nites till morning just to break all the levels! The problem with me, is that I cannot let go once I had my sight and heart set on something....so the fact that I was so determined to complete all levels, I rather forgo sleep to acheive that. It's crazy i know being that it's just a game but still...I just wanted to know what challenges each new level offered.

The other thing I busied myself with was playing with my other brother's doggie -Gabby but I call him my baby! It's such a cute little thing and he recognise a sweet kind angel when he sees one. He is such a munja litle fellow, sticking close to me and "ignoring" my brother a some point until he raised his voice. He is a good boy really, only yelping for my attention when he sees I am awake. Mum said he would patiently sit and wait outside my bedroom door once he was released...waiting for me to play with him, spawl on the ground for me to massage him and feed him treats every time he completes several commands. My bro jokingly said Gabby is such a traitor! He doesnt bark at strangers and all he wants is food and play:) Heee heeee. He is one lucky fellow because my mum will give him a rub down with a wet clothes every morn and wipe his arse when he poo.... Gabby is prob luckier than some kids born to human parents....

Waiting patienly outside the kitchen as he watches my mum cook...he loves the smell of food even though he doesnt get any of our food! Still he waits.....

 yup, little fellow loves cuddling himself up up on my legs, waiting for me to stroke him back and cuddle him.

Gabby lurves sniffing my legs..its almost like he is trying to etch my scent into memory..pls dun forget me!

Time for bed but he still wants to play! Lucky fellow even have his dedicated fan to blow at him thru the nite!